Seven-Month-Old Comics!: The January 17 Top-Shelf Edition - Part Two (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Star Wars:  Bounty Hunters#42:  The best part of this issue is Sacks weaving events from other series into the story.  For example, Jabba initially intended to use Ajax Sigma's neural core ("Star Wars:  Han Solo and Chewbacca") to power the megadroid ("Star Wars:  Yoda") but instead used Gertee's ("Star Wars:  Dark Droids").  But the rest of the story is also solid, a fitting end to this series.  

Upon arriving at Jabba's Palace, Valance takes out Dengar (and other bounty hunters) before Boba Fett knocks him unconscious, setting up a battle in Jabba's arena with the megadroid.  Of course, Valance didn't come alone; our two favorite couples — Losha and T'onga and For-Elloem and Zuckuss — arrive to help.

In a nice turn of events, Boba Fett was actually helping Valance engineer the battle so that Boba Fett (and not the megadroid) would be Jabba's favorite.  After Losha shoots open the megadroid's chest, Valance successfully destroys Gertee's neural core (which made me sad).  He then radios Chewbacca, telling him that he's on deck to rescue Han now that the megadroid is off the board.  Touchingly, he tells Chewie that Han means a lot to him, prompting Leia to comment, "That scoundrel means a lot to all of us."

The band disbands before Jabba can send more guards, and T'onga and Losha return home.  Losha is stunned to find them where they started, but T'onga explains her vision of turning their farm into a destination hub for bounty hunters.  As she says,  whichever side — the Alliance or the Empire — wins the war, they're going to bring order to the chaos, which'll make it harder for bounty hunters.  She proposes a place where they can form a community.

As she describes her vision, we're treated to a view into what some of our favorite bounty hunters from this series are doing:  Bossk wonders if he made a mistake joining Khel's crew, Dengar is still an idiot, For-Elloem and Zuckuss remain an excellent team, Tasu exults in fighting with his people, and, surprising no one, Vulkorah has a herd of tooka cats.  Also, Yura and Kondra survived the attack on the Rebel base.

Returning to T'onga, her vision would give her the community she's always wanted and the happy ending she deserves, something that I almost can't believe she'd get.  Losha can't believe it either, wondering how they're going to afford it.  Losha then reveals her ace in the hole:  Cadeliah, who's going to bank roll it.  I almost physically applauded this development, it's so perfect.

In other words, Sacks surprised me throughout this issue by wrapping up the stories of characters  that I loved and ones that I had forgotten in ways that were perfect for them.  But he's at his best when he gives us Valance's ending, as he rescues Haydenn from the Imps who've found her.  Valance is sexy AF here, which is great to see, as he struggled with his appearance and its connection to his humanity for so long.  Haydenn happily takes his hand as they ride off into the starlight.

In the end, Sacks uses this issue to remind me how much I loved this series when it met its potential.  I assume ending it was a sales-based decision, and you have to wonder if Disney and Marvel missed the chance to move beyond Valance and Losha and approach the series as an anthology, focusing on some of the great characters we saw here.  At any rate, I'm glad we got them for the time we had, and I hope Sacks is right that it's only good-bye for now.

The Weatherman, Vol. 3 #1:  This issue is honestly the best comic book I've read.  I'm going to list it as an "Issue of the Year Candidate," but I don't see any other issue topping it in the next 12 months.

2752

We begin in 2752 as Ian returns home from active duty to visit his father and stepmother.  His father is a douchebag former football player who put the medals Ian sent him in his closet since he claims he didn't have room for them in his enormous trophy room.  He asks Ian if he's bagged any "off-world fillies" and tells him that he didn't read the letters Ian sent home since he's "not much of a reader."  Ian's father takes him to said trophy room and shows him a Trumpesque portrait he commissioned, depicting him with the ball atop two lines of football players colliding into each other.  When Ian sees the title is "War," he leaves without another word.

Ian heads to the Little Umbrella, a bar where he's supposed to meet someone.  Instead, he's given an enormous surprise party.  When his high-school girlfriend, Ember, puts her hand on his shoulder, he startles and strangles her.  It's clear that Ian was exactly like Nathan back in the day as his "friends" play holos of his greatest hits, like streaking graduation and break-dancing as the prom king.  (I'm not sure why break-dancing got him ejected from prom...)  His friends are douchebags like his father, asking if he's got PTSD or if he's killed anybody.  A rattled Ian bolts from the bar, but Ember follows him and asks him to stay.

This sequence is pretty crushing, honestly.  If LeHeup isn't a veteran, he's certainly done his research, because he nails the disorienting nature of trying to reenter a group of friends that stayed the same when you've become someone else.  Interestingly, Ian is obviously from an affluent background, but we don't get the answer to a question someone shouts at him here, namely why he joined the military in the first place.

Mars 2755

On Mars, Jenner introduces Ian to Advanced Warfare Recruiter Trong, who laments that Ian's leaving the military to return to Earth.  Ian informs him that he has a family back on Earth, and Trong slips him the ORCA Program précis before telling him that he has to be where he belongs.

New York City 2757

Ian is enjoying an ice cream with his daughter, who tells him that she wants to be a weather scientist when she gets older.  When he asks why, she tells him that you make friends talking about the weather, so the more she knows about the weather the more friends she'll have.  (Yeah, it's sad.)  He asks about a stuffed lightning bolt that she's holding, and she introduces her as "Mrs. Lightning Bolt," who keeps her safe when it storms.  

Ian's daughter then asks if she can come live with him, since they could do fun things every day and be "whole people."  Ian asks why she used that term, and she confesses she got in trouble at school again and overheard her step-father tell her mom that she's broken like Ian.  (Oof.  Ian needs to kill this asshole.)  A stern Ian tells her that she isn't broken and she asks if he is.  

On cue, Ember appears, and Ian complains she's early while Ember complains he's late (meaning with child support).  He promises to send the payment the next day, and Ember tells him that she's heard that before.  Ian tells Ember that he needs to see his daughter more, but Ember doesn't think it's a good idea — we learn that Ian just got his second DUI in three months.  Ember tells him that it's his last visit for a while, and Ian says that it isn't her decision.  Ember says Roger (her husband)  is a good lawyer, and Ian tells her that Roger needs to keep that "cliche veteran bullshit" to himself.  Ember shoots back that Roger puts in the work and she doesn't have to worry that he's going to drive her daughter to school while drunk.  (Fair.)  

Ian tells Ember that his daughter is all he has, and Ember softens, telling him that she'll be in touch to formalize things and to take care of himself.  Ian's daughter returns and hugs him, telling him that she loves him and handing him Mrs. Lightning Bolt, since he needs her more than him.  Three days later, Ian joins the ORCA program.

This entire sequence is devastating.  I totally get Ember's position, and it seems pretty clear she's just trying to keep it together for her daughter.  As such, LeHeup makes this development so impactful, as he doesn't make Ember the bad guy.  It's all just sad.

Now (2770)

In an interrogation room, Cross stops Djinn from recounting this story.  She asks how Djinn came by this information, and Djinn tells her that she was a founding member of the Sword of God and part of Jenner's inner circle.  She was also Ian's and Jenner's lover at various times.  Cross asks if Ian and Jenner had any bad blood over that, and Djinn explains that came later.

In the beginning, they were part of the ORCA team, "warriors without peer," that carried out "stealth incursions, high risk rescue ops, arms deals, assassinations..."  Djinn notes that, in the end, they only had each other to maintain their faith in humanity.

Argentina (2760)

Djinn continues her narration as we move to Argentina, where Ian and Jenner are surrounded by hundreds of bodies.  Djinn notes that Ian retained hope, which we see as he opens his canteen and waters a blood-covered plant.  Meanwhile, Jenner looks at a woman who died shielding her baby, and, if I'm reading between the lines correctly, kills the baby as he decides there is no hope for humanity.  According to Djinn, "The only way to end hate, fear, and greed...to end death...is to end life itself."

Now

Cross is flippant here, asking if she means also ending gophers and cilantro.  Djinn is then super convincing - to the point where I was ready to join the Sword - that humanity truly is life's enemy.  She tells Cross she understands that it hurts too much to think of their species as an engine of destruction.  As such, people dismiss the thought but, when they lose someone they love and can't accept our innate destructiveness, they turn to revenge to make sense of the loss.  Djinn says this need for revenge triggers the same cycle of denial and projection that result in destruction.

Venus (2762)

After ORCA is defunded, Ian and Jenner meet again as guns-for-hire, where Jenner recruits Ian to join the Sword of God.  Seemingly knowing Ian is an idealist, Jenner tells him that their goal is to destroy all WMD - starting with extinction grade munitions - to end war.  Ian makes one condition:  they destroy whatever they find.

Now

Djinn informs Cross that Ian recovered the sample and gave it to Jenner.  He tries to kill Jenner when he learns he used it on Earth, but, when Jenner's men prevent him from doing so, Ian breaks free to get to the bomb on time.  Cross asks why Djinn is telling her everything, and Djinn responds that she's denying her the ability to torture her to avoid her own pain — it hurts Cross more to know the truth.  Djinn also mentions a second reason and Cross suddenly realizes that she doesn't know what happened to the girl.

New York City (April 14, 2763)

Ian's daughter is in the park with Ember and Roger when she sees a flash of light.  Ian is in a space ship heading for the site when the blast detonates.  He runs through the crowd fleeing the blast and, on the last page, we see him scream, "Sadie!", the name, if you recall, of the dog he lost in the first issue.

As I said, it's brutal.  LeHeup does a spectacular job of making no one the bad guy.  Instead, they're all people having pretty reasonable responses to the horrible things that they've done and seen.  Not only do I not know where we go from here, but I also don't know who I hope wins.  That, ladies and gentlemen, is the hallmark of a good comic.

Seven-Month-Old Comics!: The January 17 Top-Shelf Edition - Part One (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Cobra Commander #1:  Holy shit, I did NOT see that coming.  Williamson leaves a lot of questions for us here, befitting Cobra Commander's typically murky background.  But what he does reveal is amazing.

In the past, Cobra Commander - or CC, as I'm going to call him - heads up a team of scientists in an underwater kingdom called Cobra-La, where they're investigating some sort of "abomination."  The population learns about the research and, appalled, breaks into the lab to stop it.  CC dispatches spores that he developed to hold off the mob, but one of the scientists detonates a bomb that kills everyone but CC.  He's left terribly scarred, and Cobra-La's doctors heal him with a three-headed snake.  He awakens wrapped in bandages, and a woman named Pythona informs him to put on his iconic helmet to cover his shame, which includes a now reptilian eye (I think).

Pythona brings him to the king, Golobulus, who tells him that he found him "lost in the outside world," which I assume means that CC is human and not Cobra-Lan.  Golobulus exposits that Cobra-La worships only the organic, so CC and the scientists' research is blasphemous.  (I should've seen where we're going here, but I didn't.)  Golobulus accuses CC of instigating the riots (possibly so he could use his defense against the rioters to justify Golobulus giving him a leadership position, which he demands here) and orders his men to kill him.  He quips that he healed him just to watch him die with his own eyes, letting us everything we need to know about Golobulus.

But CC is CC so he uses insect-like drones to crawl into the guards' bodies and kill them.  CC warns Golobulus that Cobra-La's isolation means its resources are dwindling, though his research can save it.  To do so, he has to go on a "special mission" to the outside.  Golobulus, revealing a reptilian eye like CC's, agrees.  CC walks back to the lab and reveals the abomination:  a comatose Megatron!  

CC exposits that the only thing he's kept from Golobulus is the existence of Cybertron.  CC tortures Megatron once again and discovers other energy signatures like his.  (I'm not sure why he had to torture him to identify similar energy signatures, but it is what it is.)  CC plans to track down the Transformers to explore their energy, which he describes as not just powerful but also "transformative."  CC departs, and Megatron opens a menacing eye.

In the present, CC kills a man for his car and, with the minder Golobulus demanded accompany him, heads to what appears to be Zartan's place in the Floridian swamps.

In other words, it's fucking great.  The Skybound team is clearly keeping Megatron on ice (literally) before launching him on Earth, giving us time to see other threats build.  Right now, I'm most interested in the fact that CC seems genuinely loyal to Golobulus, given that he believes that Golobulus can provide the army CC needs to control the world.  It'll be interesting to see how quickly that loyalty is tested.

G.I. Joe:  A Real American Hero #303:  This issue is pretty straight to the point.

At the Pit, the Joes watch a Revanche helicopter land on Cobra Island for an audience with Serpentor Khan.  Alpha-001 proposes a working relationship between the two organizations, though Khan is skeptical since Revanche apparently delivered B.A.T.s to Cobra that he programmed to respond only to Revanche.  Alpha-001 talks about the benefit of turning Khan's mutants into cyborgs.  A Viper volunteers to be a test subject, and Revanche's surgical bot turns him into a cyborg on the spot.

At the Pit, Duke asks Spirit to prepare for the Khan-Revanche alliance to try to break into the Pit, even though they're all pretty sure the alliance will make a play for Springfield first (which is why the Joes are sending a "sneak and peak" team there).  

In Springfield, Dawn sneaks into town to visit her parents (I only know her name due to the dramatis personae from issue #301) and thanks them for suffering some sort of trouble for something she did.  She pledges never to hurt them but has a weird look on her face when she does so so I'm not sure she means it.

Back at the Pit, Spirit identifies three Vipers at the perimeter.  Lady Jayne (I think) briefs Duke or Hawk that the Vipers are sporting Revanche technology and puts two and two together when it comes to Revanche's visit to Cobra Island.  Instead of eliminating them, Duke or Hawk suggests they take advantage of the Viper's reconnaissance to feed them some fake intel.

Meanwhile, an assassination team of enhanced Blue Ninjas arrives to take out Scarlett and Snake-Eyes in the Sierras.  Scarlett and Snake-Eyes kill all the Blue Ninjas save one who goes kamikaze on them before dying.  Watching from Cobra Island, Khan and his cronies see the dust from the blast settle on the seemingly dead Scarlett and Snake-Eyes.  (I'm going to guess the corpses are just Blue Ninjas dressed as them.)  Khan is impressed and orders as many units as Alpha-001 can deliver.

Kill Your Darlings #5:  Given how much happened in previous issues, this one is pretty sparse, though extremely relevant.

In 1987, Rose's mom discovers she's pregnant.  She leaves a message for the child's father, telling him that he ruined her life and her only consolation is that he'll never know the baby.  As she's driving herself to the hospital to deliver Rose on a dark and stormy night, she hits a boy.  She finds him dying on the side of the road but declines to help him.  After delivering Rose, Rose's mother cries as she learns from a television news interview with the boy's grandmother that he died.  As a dark hand floats over Rose's crib and flames surround Rose's mother's bed, the grandmother - pretty clearly the Girl Who Wouldn't Burn as an elderly woman, who's raised the boy since his mother mysteriously disappeared ten years earlier - pledges revenge for his death during the interview.

We obviously have a lot going on here.  You have to wonder why a ten-year-old boy was wandering a road on a dark and stormy night.  It's also suspicious that his mother "disappeared" and that the Girl Who Wouldn't Burn seemingly allowed herself to age.  At any rate, this issue provides a more sympathetic portrait of Rose's mother than we got from Evil last issue.

Seven-Month-Old Comics!: The January 10 Top-Shelf Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

The Sacrificers #6:  Remender doesn't give us happy endings almost as a rule, but fuck me if he doesn't at least give us one to conclude this arc.

First things first, Soluna is alive but wizened.  The Foreman gloats over successfully luring her into his lair and tells her that free will is an illusion.  In the most Remender way possible, the Foreman gets his comeuppance when Pigeon bursts from the pipes and the elixir the Foreman created from Soluna's essence falls on him.  Pigeon helps Soluna to her feet as an enraged Foreman attacks him.  The pair tries to flee but falls through a trap outside the castle.  Pigeon opens his eyes to find Noom's skull and whispers to himself that she was his only friend.  He then hears a horn, which we see the Foreman's assistant blowing to send out the "Husks."  (This entire sequence is spectacular, not just because of Fiurama's amazing art but also due to Remender's propulsive script.)

Meanwhile, Rokus visits Luna on the Moon, where we see many versions of her arguing over which one gets to face the world.  Rokos tells Luna that their fighting is harming their daughter and reminds her that it was never his choice to separate.  Luna tells him that she will not participate in "this abomination."  Rokos screams at Luna that she participated in the ceremony for eons without a problem, and she tells him that she's simply acting on what they all know — it's time to turn over power to the next generation.  (Man, this theme is relevant this month!)  

Rokos says that the next generation isn't ready and rages when Luna criticizes what he's doing to his own people, since he believes that he's serving their every need.  He attacks her, and, when her other selves try to defend her, he destroys them.  He demands that she return with him to the palace, drink the elixir, and raise their daughter, but she tells him that she won't become something she hates to survive.  In a true Remember moment, Rokos kills her, saying that she will never eclipse him again.  I mean, wow.  I think I stopped breathing at some point here it was so intense.

In a tangled forest of vines, Pigeon tries to carry Soluna but can't.  They fall into a poisonous bog, and Soluna says that she won't run — she's going to wait for Luna to save her.  When Pigeons asks why Luna would do that, she tells him that Luna is her mother.  Pigeon is stunned that she's "one of them" while Soluna rails at the moon, which turns to face her and then disappears.

The Husks arrive and attack, and Pigeon tells Soluna to stand.  She says that she no longer has a reason to do so, and Pigeon uses newfound powers to rip the Husks to shreds.  While he marvels at what he did, Soluna attacks him, realizing that he has her powers.  She demands that he return her powers or she'll do...something, but Pigeon hurls her to the ground before she can finish that threat.  In a spectacular moment, he looks on her with a face full of determination and strength (thanks to Fiurama) and tells her that she'll do nothing.  

Telling Pigeon that she's lost everything, Soluna demands he help her.  He tells her that people helped her for her entire life and the only way to help her now is to leave her on her own.  She pledges her family will reward him, and he tells her that her family murdered his best friend so he's going to reward them.

Ha!  Again, I worry for Pigeon, but right now?  I'm going to gloat in the comeuppance that he's set to bring.

Star Wars #42:  This issue is interesting for a number reasons, in no small part because it really delves into Jedi lore.  But Soule goes further, as Gretta's feelings for Luke become clear in a way that we usually don't see in "Star Wars."

The issue begins with Luke tracking down Gretta, revealing that Artoo ("Star Wars'" true hero) tracked her telemetry after they last met and they've been visiting her potential destinations since the Scourge's threat ended.  Luke tells Gretta that he wants to enter the red khyber crystal again so that he can get more experience confronting Sith, since he knows that he'll have to face the Sith one day.

Barging into the room, Gretta's Auntie Feez tells Luke that she's Force-sensitive but didn't become a Jedi because it's a path for obsessives.  (She isn't wrong.)  Feez tells Luke that she taught Gretta everything she knew about the ritual they tried last time but hasn't told her everything she knows.  (She never really addresses why she didn't, which seems selfish given the fact the Fallanassi are virtually extinct.)  Feez agrees to help Luke, given he helped Gretta.  Luke exposits that he feels like if he can cure the crystal, he can bring a Sith back to the light as well.  (Aha!)

Feez explains that 1) each crystal is unique because each Sith's pain is unique and 2) pain tends to pull in everyone around it so it's possible to get lost in the crystal.  To bring the crystal to the light again, Luke will have to travel through the owner's memories, which are embedded in the crystal.  Luke leaves, and Feez teases Gretta about how Luke is only interested in the Force, unlike most boys his age.  Feez is worried about breaking the law and helping a Jedi, but she agrees with Gretta's assessment that Luke seems lonely and has kind eyes.

At a ritual that night, Feez guides Luke into the crystal, where he once again encounters the Sith that he first saw.  The Sith's guards make quick work of him and throw Luke in the dungeon.  The Sith expresses surprise, though, that Luke is clean and has a lightsaber, explaining that the last Jedi in his (I think) court was a jester until he committed suicide.  The Sith then expresses skepticism that a Jedi could "heal" him since they couldn't even save themselves.

In other words, this period isn't great for a Jedi, which is definitely intriguing.  Soule seems ready to tell a story that he really wants to tell, so I'm here for it.

Transformers #4:  Ho boy.

With Starscream in hot pursuit, Optimus radioes Ratchet to tell him that he's taken major damage and Spike is hurt.  Ratchet apologizes to Wheeljack's prone form, telling him that they need firepower.  In a fantastic sequence, Starscream lands in front of Optimus and hovers over him menacingly.  Johnson then changes the perspective to Carly, as she sees Starscream through Cliffjumper's windshield.  Carly tells Cliffjumper to, "Get his ass.", and Cliffjumper rams Starscream, throwing him to the ground.  Optimus then takes the chance to drive over him.  Ha!  Starscream calls Soundwave for backup as Optimus and Cliffjumper speed away.

The team arrives at the hospital, and Sparky runs to the awaiting doctors carrying Spike.  Laserbeak arrives, and Cliffjumper and Optimus cover the hospital staff as Laserbeak opens fire.  Rumble takes down Cliffjumper as Soundwave arrives in all his glory, with a kick to Optimus' face.  Starscream arrives and tells Soundwave to halt, noting, with joy in his voice, the hospital is where they "fix the squishy ones."  He rants that he can't believe Optimus would bring the "ants" to "get repaired."  To exacerbate Optimus' suffering, Starscream opens fire on the hospital, taking out the generator and delaying Spike's surgery.

Soundwave warns Starscream they've got incoming Autobots, and Cliffjumper gives us his best, "All right!!!" as Jazz speeds at the Decepticons.  Jazz transforms and launches a rocket at Stascream's head and then slides under Soundwave.  Regrouping, the four Autobots face the four Decepticons, who flee.  

In yet another amazing scene, Optimus later watches Spike's prone form from a hole in the hospital's ceiling, and  we learn that, without power, the doctors can't keep Spike, or several other patients, alive.  Sparky cries over his "beautiful boy," which hit the dad in me in the feels.  It also hit Optimus in the feels, since he opens his chasis and uses the Matrix to power the hospital.  Ratchet tries to stop him, but Optimus says, "No more death[,] even if it comes at a price."  One of the nurses says "Oh, thank God," and one of the doctors replies, "Not God...thank...metal?"

At the Ark, Soundwave criticizes Starscream for his lack of a plan and focus only on destruction.  Starscream demands repairs, but Soundwave notes that the materials they need only exist in Cybertronian technology.  He and Starscream then look at a still-wounded Skywarp who screams, "What are you doing?  Brothers?", as they rip him to shreds.  (It's interesting he calls them 'brothers," a term of endearment I wouldn't associate with Decepticons."

At the hospital, Sparky tells Spike's comatose body that, after the war, he moved him and his brother to Farmington so he could protect them from where he was raised, another reminder of how grim Sparky's life sounds like it was.  He tells Spike that he couldn't see the good in the world after the war and his brother's death.  He says his depression (though he doesn't call it that) is like a sickness that spreads to the ones he loves the most and contemplates how he doesn't have Spike there to remind him of the good.  

From the courtyard, he overhears a young patient on an IV ask Optimus to transform, which he does, delighting the boy.  Sparky asks Optimus if he saved Spike and, if he did, could he do it again as Spike is in a coma.  Optimus explains that the Matrix is now empty so what happens now "is up to the Great Spark."  

In the hospital, Ratchet tells Optimus he's fixed the generator and then reminds him that they need him.  He knows the Matrix, when empty, drains its host, and he's worried Optimus chose to save Spike instead of fix himself.  Optimus calls the humans innocent, and Ratchet disagrees, noting they're prone to destruction, as they're the ones who shot Spike.  Optimus comments, "Just like us."

Jazz collapses, and Ratchet explains that he pooled all their energon to get him going.  Ratchet makes the point that they all die if Optimus dies and then they won't be there to protect the humans from the Decepticons.  (Fair enough, Ratchet.)  Ratchet suggests they use something in Optimus' trailer to even the score, as they're the last of their kind, "fighting for survival."  Optimus balks and, before we see what it is, Sparky arrives, telling them that he has an idea about their energy problem.

Inside Carly's broken house, Cliffjumper attempts to console her, telling her that Starscream killed his clan and he joined the war the next day.  Carly cries and asks Cliffjumper if the feeling ever stops, and he simply comments, "Oh, Carly."  It's an incredibly moving moment, an example of why this series is so engaging.  At this point, Optimus arrives, with Megatron's cannon (clearly the item in his trailer) on his arm, asking them if they're ready to go on the offensive.  Fuck, yes!

Meanwhile, Starscream drags Decepticon bodies that he's raided to a pile, gloating that he's the Deception leader, "Today!  Tomorrow!  Forever!"  Putting some doubt on that, we end with a panel of Megatron on ice somewhere else.

In other words, man, I love this series.

Seven-Month-Old Comics!: The January 3 Top-Shelf Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

The Hunger and the Dusk #5:  This issue is the best in a series where every issue so far has been a gem.

First things first, I realize the question propelling this series is:  What if the elven lands beyond the sea were a nightmare?  Many fantasy worlds have such lands - Everett in "Forgotten Realms" and the Undying Lands in "Lord of the Rings," for example - and Willow is turning their usual portrayals as havens on their heads.

We get the first hint of the problem when the Vangols' leader tells Mikil that "Vangol" means "Sky-Dweller" in the old tongue.  The Vangols believed they were taller than the other races because they used to walk among the clouds.  One day, they decided to cross the sea to find the stars that lay beyond them, only to discover "doom," a doom so terrible, the leader tells Mikhil, "that all your mighty history will shrink, and your wars with the orkren will seem like the squabbles of children over toys."  The gang is staring down the barrel of trouble, in other words.

Based on recent observations, the leader realizes Cal is sentimental and orders his people to bring Mikil above ground as bait for the Last Men.  True to form, Cal is leading the Last Men after Mikil, despite Tara insisting that Mikil wouldn't want him to risk so many lives for his own life.  As Tara warned, the Vangols attack.  Cal orders the Last Men to push the Vangols towards the water.  Tara tells him that they can't survive an advance like that, but Cal is undeterred.  The Vangols' leader emerges and takes on Cal, who only survives because Tara is able to use some sort of sorcery to hurt him and force the Vangols' retreat.

Cal is thrilled at the success, but Tara is irate that Cal risked their lives unnecessarily.  Later that night, a sexy AF Cal bathes in a stream as Tara tells him that she's healed Mikil but he, like everyone else, needs rest.  Instead, Cal wants them to travel to higher ground since they're vulnerable in the grasslands.  Tara laments that they don't fight the orcish way, and Cal tells her they can't, because their society has been collapsing for 100 years.  (Interestingly, they don't even remember the name of their gods, if they had any.)  Cal asserts that humanity has managed to keep the orcs at bay, and Tara quips that "at bay" means attacking "innocent herdsmen."  Cal retorts that those "herdsmen" raze farms for grazing lands.  It's...tense.

Annoyed, Tara decides to leave, and Cal apologizes for getting angry, which shows a lot of understanding on his part given she was the one to start the fight.  Tara is packing her bags while asserting the treaty was doomed to fail, and Cal again tries to get her to stay.  When she refuses, he insists on going with her to return to her family, since he gave his pledge to Overlord Troth.  But Tara flips, saying that she's the daughter of an overlord and he's just the "bastard son of some illiterate raider."  Cal looks physically wounded and Tara horrified.  She tries to apologize, but he lets her go.  Sev is devastated, since Tara was the best (if not one only) chance for peace, and Cal laments that someone else will have to try to make the treaty work because he failed.

In other words, Willow doesn't just fill in some blanks spaces in her world-building here but also delivers an issue with serious emotional heft.  You feel Cal's helplessness that he can't make the alliance work, both politically with the orcs and likely romantically with Tara, and Tara's impatience when the differences between the humans and the orcs seem insurmountable.  Again, this series is one of the best on the shelves.

The Space Between #3:  Oof, this issue hits in the feels.  Beckho rights the ship (heh) here by breaking the repetition we saw last issue.  Instead of telling the story of two people coming together to change the Dodona, she focuses on the consequences of some of these actions.

Ten years after "the Tumult," the Dodona is off course.  The issue opens with Juni, one of Pari's protégés, committing suicide by opening his mask in space.  After Pari retrieves Juni's body, he meets Bee with his new protégé, Eden, at a park.  They discuss how Juni knew about the Dodona's fate since he was a pilot and lost hope.  Even optimistic Pari concedes that he and Bee passed on their reproduction token the previous year given the possibility they'll never reach their destination.  As they sit, a creepy guy named Rue appears, and his intense interest in Eden disturbs her — she asks Bea and Pari not to leave her alone with him.

Later, Eden and Pari review the situation, and Pari laments the Council isn't focused on the problem since they're too busy (understandably) keeping on the air and water (barely) after the sabotage during the Tumult.  Apparently, the pilots only discovered the problem when they realized the star around which New Home orbits was moving.  As they're talking, Rue makes the situation worse when he 'casts the situation to everyone on the ship, destroying what remained of morale.

Realizing they have little choice but to go around the reluctant Council, Bee, Eden, and Pari use Bee's legacy access to the archives to go through the Dodona's schematics.  It turns out that "an airlock without a real lock" exists in the zoological repository.  To correct the Dodona's course manually, someone will need to open the lock and perform an unauthorized space walk, though it will likely kill the species in the enclosure where the airlock is located.

Bee and Pari make one more appeal to the Council, which dismisses Pari's concerns given they have over 100 years before they're supposed to reach New Home.  Pari stresses they don't have 100 years to fix the problem, but the Council isn't hearing it.  Pari storms from the meeting and tells Bee that he plans on taking the one-way walk to fix the problem that he believes he caused.  Eden arrives and says that she's the one who's going to open the thruster, since Rue apparently made the announcement to get her attention.  Thankfully, Bee tells them that they're both idiots for thinking that they're to blame.

Two days later, when Bee wonders if she can breed humans who can live in marginal environments so someone doesn't have to do the walk, Eden tells her they only have 12 hours to correct the Dodona's course.  Bee agrees to help, and she and Eden meet Pari at the repository.  Rue appears as well because he's now stalking Eden, and they all make their way past the animals.  (We learn the Council kept the repository quiet because they'd eliminate the animals first if they had to do so.  Also, hilariously, no one knows how the house cats escaped.)

The Council put the most dangerous species, to its mind, in the airlock:  the flying squirrels.  (They were — not unreasonably — concerned about its reproductive rates.)  Bee and Pari enter the enclosure to remove the squirrels so they don't die when they open the airlock, but an insane Rue puts on Pari's suit and heads out the airlock.  Pari manages to close it behind him, and Eden decides to go after Rue.  Bee and Pari try to catch the squirrels who escaped the enclosure, to no avail, but eventually feel the Dodona correct its course.  Eden returns and confirms Rue died once he opened the thruster to move it.  She's devastated, worrying that she let him commit suicide because he frightened her.  Again, Bee isn't having it, saying he chose to do it.  

Later, the Council treats his death as a suicide, and, based on Eden's comment that the ship needing a hero and not needing to know they had Rue instead, it seems like the Dodona residents know that he corrected their course.  Of course, as Pari said, the sensors still aren't working, so they don't know for sure if they're on the right  course.

Beckho takes an interesting turn here as we start seeing the ship's residents struggle with their mission as they get closer and closer to New Home.  I wonder how she's going to wrap up the story with just one more issue, but she certainly amps up the tension here.

Star Wars:  Darth Vader #42:  This issue is odd, as Pak focuses on two different stories that seem to have nothing to do with each other.  

On one hand, Vader successfully confronts the Machine-Augmened Rebels, or M.A.R., Corps, and implants the Imperial droid processors in them.  Pak does little to make the Corps interesting, barely giving us their names, so it's hard to feel too badly for them.  

Meanwhile, the Emperor is displeased with Grand Vizier Mas Amedda's performance, given he failed to take out a weakened Vader, and moves his favor to now-Administrator (and no longer Sub-Administrator) Moore.  Moore visits Vader in Mustafar as he tries to improve upon the now-captive Corps.  She offers him the Schism Imperial's services, telling him the right mid-level bureaucrat in the right place can help him.  That said, I'm still not really sure what the Schism's goals are, other than seemingly taking out the Emperor.

Honestly, I feel like Pak is really wearing out this idea that Vader is in rebellion against the Emperor and that the Emperor wants him dead, since I really don't have a good sense of either Sith's motives.  Everyone else keeps making these observations but they themselves don't.  I'm guessing it's a certain level of strategic ambiguity but we'll see.

Seven-Month-Old Comics: The December 27 Top-Shelf Edition - Part Two (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Star Wars:  Dark Droids #5:  First, I just realized that the hybroid I didn't recognize is Tolvan, who I admit is one of the few characters I miss from "Doctor Aphra."

Soule wraps up things fairly neatly here, as Ajax kills the Scourge just as he manages to take over organics.  I *think* he's able to take over all organics when he takes over Luke and thus gains access to the Force for the first time.  (I guess Vader never let him access it when they merged in "Star Wars:  Darth Vader" #40?)  The Scourge is contemplating becoming the new Force by now taking over non-sentient creatures when Ajax stabs him.

With the Scourge gone, Ajax invites the new D-Squad to join him at the Second Revelation, though they all demur.  Disturbingly, he re-activates the Spark Eternal and revises his revelations:  the third revelation becomes about "them" and the fourth one is now "all."  I still don't totally understand the Spark Eternal business, but it seems like Ajax is going to become the threat that Triple Zero warns him not to become when they parted.

Overall, "Star Wars:  Dark Droids" was an OK event.  I still feel like Soule could've done a better job giving us more information about the intelligence that became the Scourge, particularly since he once again makes it clear here that he and the Spark Eternal are two separate entities.  Ajax only seems to resurrect the Spark Eternal, so is the Scourge - or, at least, the intelligence that joined the Spark Eternal to become the Scourge - truly dead?  If I understood more about his nature, I think I'd have a better grasp on that.

Honestly, I think it's getting to the point where we need to end this interlude between "Star Wars:  The Empire Strikes Back" and "Star Wars:  Return of the Jedi" and plunge into the unknown.  Between this event and the much less enjoyable "Star Wars:  Hidden Empire," it's feel like we're spinning our wheels.

Star Wars #41:  They're not kidding when they say you should read "Star Wars:  Dark Droids" #5 first!

The first few pages more or less mirror what we saw in that issue, as Chewie, Lando, Leia, and Luke fight off the Scourge's minions.  Once the possession ends (after Ajax kills the Scourge), Lando finds Lobot, whose condition has deteriorated.  Leia and Luke stay to help all the humans suddenly freed from the Scourge's control, and Lando has Chewie carry Lobot to the Falcon.  He asks Chewie to keep secret what he's going to show him until after Lobot is healed and then reveals the Talky.

But Lando's plan goes screwy when Leia and Luke arrive, informing him that the authorities had everything under control.  (Heh.  You almost never see that in comics, and I laughed out loud.  "We're good, heroes, thanks!")  The Talky refuses to heal Lobot until he's sure Lando really does care about him (since, if he does, he'd keep the Talky alive in case Lobot falls ill again).  To prove his connection to Lobot, Lando confesses everything to Chewie, Leia, and Luke.  

But he does so after he tries a different story.  He stops himself and tells the truth:  he agreed to spy on the Alliance to save himself from Jabba and, because he never actually passed along information, he sent Jabba the Talky as a way to save himself again.  But Lando goes one step further, confessing that he stayed with the Alliance to build up the trust he needed them to have in him so that he could take the Falcon and retrieve the Talky.

The gambit works, and the Talky fixes Lobot, who's capable of speech again.  It's pretty unbelievable.  Lando admits to Lobot that he decided to try out the new Lando that he's just getting to know.  Of course, he might not get a chance, since Leia arrives with guards to arrest him, announcing the penalty of treason is death!

Star Wars:  Darth Vader #41:  Like all the best cross-over issues, Pak uses the event to tease out truths about Vader here and advance the series' existing plot.  

First things first, Vader doesn't surrender himself to the Scourge:  he captures the Scourge's consciousness within a closed-loop system in his suit, studying him so he can replicate his ability to control droids.  (It's why, as mentioned above, the Scourge didn't get access to the Force until he possessed Luke in "Star Wars:  Dark Droids" #5.)  When an Imperial unit arrives to take in Vader (Ha!) for attempting to assassinate the Emperor, Vader uses this control to see through his droids' eyes and use the Force on anyone in his now-expanded visual range.

But the Scourge is right that Vader can't process nearly the number of consciousnesses that he (the Scourge) can, and Vader struggles under the weight of this control.  Vader takes out the droids attacking him, and the Scourge presumably dies in "Star Wars:  Dark Droids" #5 before he can send more after him.  The issue ends with the revelation of the "Schism Imperial," a trio of three Imperial officials, including the Umbaran, who clearly seek to overthrow Palpatine.

As I said, it was fun to see Vader pull a fast one on the Scourge, a reminder of his resourcefulness that we haven't seen here lately.

Seven-Month-Old Comics: The December 27 Top-Shelf Edition - Part One (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Alan Scott:  Green Lantern #3:  This issue is somewhat hard to follow, since it's hard to tell which corpse is which corpse, given they're all in a similar state and Alan definitely has a type.

Alan arrives at a pier where gays cruise and tells Mikey, one of the regulars, that he's looking for someone.  (I bet he is.)  Mikey tells Alan that Tommy, another regular, drowned and others "ain't been around."  Mikey notes that Tommy was wearing combats boots when he died, but, before Alan can learn more, the cops arrive, and Alan uses his powers to disappear.

(I'll say here that it's a confusing start to the issue, as it really isn't clear why Alan was initially at the pier.  After reading this sequence a few times, I'm pretty sure Alan was going to have sex with Tommy, since he mentions that he and Tommy hooked up every once in a while.  Initially, though, I thought he was just there looking for information about Robbie's death, but I don't think that's true.)

At any rate, Alan decides to find out more about Tommy's death.  At the morgue, the Flash exposits that Tommy also has burns on his wrists and ankles, like Robbie did.  The Flash alludes to the fact that the case is personal to Alan, and Alan looses his shit at the implication that he's gay.  The Flash doesn't directly address Alan's sexuality but instead repeats something Alan previously said, that, "There is no society without justice...for all."  He then informs Alan that the Justice Society of America (JSA) has already dispatched the Spectre to look into Tommy's case.

(Again, the revelation that the JSA is working on Tommy's case is weird, for a number of reasons.  First, I assume the JSA learned about Tommy's death from Alan, so I don't get why they're keeping information form him, even if they're worried he's too emotionally connected to the case.  Second, it doesn't seem like that much time passed between when Tommy died and Flash and Green Lantern are in the morgue.  Can't they wait for the NYPD to investigate?  Are they investigating every missing person case in New York?)

In an alley, Alan finds the Spectre, who digs his fingers into the head of a guy whose girlfriend is a file clerk in the precinct and tells him about all the cases that cross her desk.  (It turns out he's dating her to pass on the information to his boss, Don Rocco Santucci.)  Learning that Tommy's file is in the nearby precinct, Alan and the Spectre head to the file room there.  They discover the file empty, and Alan notes it's in the wrong precinct, given where Tommy died.  

(Again, I had some issues here.  I get the Spectre is looking into Tommy's death, but why go to Santucci's guy instead of the file clerk herself?  The Spectre comments that he'd been chasing boyfriends all day, so was he shaking down the boyfriends of every record clerk in every precinct in New York?  Is every file clerk in New York dating a mob guy who the Spectre feels more comfortable shaking down than the clerks themselves?)

As a cop, the Spectre notes that the best way to bury a file is not to create one in the first place.  He hypothesizes someone created the empty file to point the finger at Alan, since he can walk through walls and the file contained compromising material about him (i.e., a file existed but Alan expunged the information, and anyone who read the file would guess it was him).  (This part also doesn't really make sense, since it isn't like people who knew Alan was gay knew the Green Lantern was Alan, except for J. Edgar.)  Alan informs the Spectre that Robbie and Tommy displayed the same wounds as Johnny.  

Alan feels the weight of all three deaths on his shoulders, and the Spectre delivers a speech about how God reserves his retribution for people who judge and hate people like Robbie and Tommy and Alan.  A grieving Alan hugs the Spectre, who comforts him, telling him that he doesn't deserve divine punishment because he puts on the ring and cape and tries to do good.  He then echoes something Johnny said in issue #1, that, "If God himself didn't want you to love - then how could you?"  It's a little too speechy to be moving, I'll be honest.

At any rate, the Spectre says that they need to find the 42 men who served on Project Crimson, prompting Alan to remark, "Forty-one."  Recalling that the "voice" said it brings death, life, and then power, Alan heads home.  Before he arrives, we have an interlude where Doiby is listening to a broadcast discussing how a Soviet submarine went missing off Greenland's coast.  Upon entering his study, Alan encounters the Red Lantern and calls him, "Johnny."  Johnny punches him and then speaks to him in Russian, ending with, "My love."

Although an awkward issue, I'm hoping Sheridan just needed to cut some corners to move us to this next stage, one that seems to have a lot of potential.  Are we going Winter Soldier here?  Or was Johnny always a Soviet agent?  Poor Alan.

Duke #1:  Holy shit, this issue is great.  I was excited about Skybound taking over these characters because I expected them to do a great job, but we're exceeding even my high expectations.

In my review of "G.I. Joe:  A Real American Hero" #302, I noted that series has so far lagged behind "Transformers" and "Void Rivals" in terms of the larger "Energon Universe" story.  That said, we hit the ground running on that larger story here, as Hawk tells a broken Duke to pull himself together.  Instead of snapping to attention, Duke essentially tells Hawk to go fuck himself after Hawk refuses to acknowledge the military is lying to him about Starscream killing Frosting in "Transformers" #1.  Speaking about Frosting's family (including his baby boy), Duke vows to get to the bottom of the mystery.

Six months later, a disheveled Duke arrives at a townhouse with a bunch of UFO enthusiasts.  Their conversations disturb him, though some people are clearly speaking about seeing the Transformers (and others...not so much).  Before Duke can leave, Dr. Adele Burkhart introduces herself.  Telling Duke that it's easier to hide the truth among the ridiculous, she brings him to her office.  She tells him that she invited him to the meeting because she used to work on a project to use the Big Bang's cosmic dust as a renewable energy source.  At some point, though, she began to question the project's direction.  The project was allegedly put on ice, but Burkhart is worried that someone is using her research to create the next doomsday weapon.  She sends Duke to M.A.R.S. Industries, which I should've recognized earlier is Destro's company.

Duke manages to break into M.A.R.S. and sees an assembly line of robots.  Duke clearly thinks these robots are the Transformers, but before he can gather more information a Colossus-looking dude named Mercer grabs him.  Mercer wants to off him, but Destro orders him to release Duke.  Destro is disturbed that Destro let him free and heads to Burkhart's, where he discovers someone has killed the enthusiasts and left Burkhart for dead.  She hands Duke something before the police arrive on the scene, clearly sent by Destro so Duke would take the fall for the deaths.

Elsewhere, Hawk gets orders to bring in Duke, which Cover Girl tells him is going to be tough.  He responds that he knows, which is why he's going to assign the job to Stalker and Rock 'n Roll.

Again, it's great stuff here.  Given what we're seeing in "Transformers," it seems ridiculous the government would try to cover up the destruction the Decepticons have already wrought.  But I love the idea of a rogue Duke, so I'm excited to see where we go. 

Local Man #8:  Jack uses his new powers of emotional perception, if you will, to convince Kopecki to run Inga's warehouse's property record.  After Jack has sex with Inga outside the quarry (we learn they first met there when Jack was busting kids doing drugs), Kopecki calls him to say the LLC is anonymous but is registered to Brian and Inga's house.  After encountering Seascape, Brian (for some reason) also heads to the quarry, and Jack accuses him of being the one storing 4th Gen.  Seascape appears again before they can fight each other, and Jack realizes that it's Inga and not Brian behind the warehouse.  Dun-dun-dun!

No/One #7:  This issue moves more expeditiously than previous ones, as Higgins and Buccellato take this story to the next stage.

First things first, Ben meets with his friend, Sherm, who asks if he really has the guts to kill his son for the crimes Ben is convinced Aaron committed.  Meanwhile, at Julia's apartment, Danielle knocks on her door and apologizes for the article she wrote about her mom.  Julia isn't buying it, but Danielle continues, expressing outrage over what the Ledger assholes did to her.  Julia opens her door to scream at Danielle, but she's surprised when Danielle hands over all the work the police have done on Copycat #3.  (I'm not sure how Danielle got that, which I'm guessing is relevant.  Is Danielle No/One?)

At Aaron's apartment, Ben arrives with a gun, and Aaron encourages him to kill him if it'll make him feel better.  Ben tells Aaron not to put his (Aaron's) imminent death on him (Ben) and once again implies that his bad parenting is responsible.  Aaron has to break it to him that his actions weren't about Ben.  (Seriously, Ben, it's time for therapy.)  Aaron doubts that Ben has the guts to pull the trigger, but the gun fires, either because Ben did pull the trigger or No/One startled him from behind.  No/One tells Ben they need to take down Aaron the right way, and he and Ben leave.

That night, Julia arrives at Ben's house with the files.  As they work, Noah Kemp is on Alana's show ranting about how someone needs to hold the podcast reporters accountable for getting his brother killed.  Not unreasonably, Alana asks whether he's suggesting Donovan should've preemptively attacked the journalists in question, if his (Noah's) preemptive defense law had been in effect.  Noah says that he's not suggesting that...but then rambles about how it's "unamerican" to put people in a position "with no options."  (So what are the options, Noah?  How do you engage in preemptive defense without killing someone?)

Suddenly, Julia has an inspiration that lead her and Ben to conclude that Copycat #3 is Harrison Gill.   He was a "disgruntled employee of P3" whom the police interviewed after Tobias North's murder but didn't consider a suspect.  But, in reviewing the Cade case, Julia realizes that Chuck spilled the beans about Cade to his bartender — Harrison Gill.

Ben arrives at the bar, and Gill greets him calling him "Ben" instead of "Jim."  Gill notices Singh outside and Harper inside and tells Ben that he has to change the keg.  Singh texts McGarrity, who's covering the back exit.  McGarrity tries to stop him, but Gill stabs him.  McGarrity surveys and tells the others, as they arrive on the scene, that Gill was heading to a car.  Gill manages to escape, but Harper finds the Richard Roe mask and gun in Gill's glove compartment.

It seems pretty clear that Gill is Copycat #3, though I'm confused how Ben didn't make that connection earlier.  It's nice to have one question answered here, though we still don't know if Gill was Richard Roe (as he claimed) and either as Copycat #3 or Roe he worked alone.

The podcast doesn't really expand on the story too much, particularly since it mostly just replays Noah's conversation with Alanna.  

The most interesting revelations are conformation that Gill's gun is the same one used in the Copycat #3 murders and that Gill was friends with two of the employees who Tobias North threw under the bus and who both later committed suicide.  

The podcast doesn't address No/One's identity, but Ben confirms that he still thinks Aaron is Richard Roe (and not Gill, as he claimed he was).

For the fact that we've gone this long without answers to basic questions, I'll say that I'm not as antsy as I usually am.  Higgins and Buccellato are doing a fantastic job in terms of the pacing, making you really uncertain about facts that you think you know.  It's really one of my must-reads right now.

Seven-Month-Old Comics: The December 20 Top-Shelf Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

G.I. Joe:  A Real American Hero #302:  Given how much we've seen happen in "Transformers" and "Void Rivals," it feels weird how little progress we've seen in this title.  But Hama makes it clear that he's taking his time as he dedicates five almost-wordless panels at Wade Collins' funeral.

The issue opens with Serpentor Khan attempting to rally the Cobra Island mutants to his cause — to take over Cobra HQ in Springfield and then the world.  When someone questions why they need him, he shoots the offending someone in the head and offers his corpse as food to the rest of the mutants.  Needless to say, it seems clear they'll follow him.  The best part, though, is when a mutant who was an old lady on a Rascal asks Khan what his plans are — underscoring Hama's ability to make Cobra look as ridiculous as it occasionally is.

In Springfield, Cobra Commander briefs the family members of the Cobra employees he left on the Island, informing them that they're mobilizing all Cobra's resources to prepare for the inevitable attack Khan will launch on them.  At Revanche's HQ, Alpha-001 learns of Khan's plans via hidden cameras the B.A.T.S planted in the Casino.

At the Pit in Utah, Mongoose asks Stalker why Collins got an Arlington funeral when he was a Cobra Crimson Guard.  Stalker explains Wade was part of his and Snake-Eyes' unit in Vietnam.  After a Vietcong attack, they thought Wade died, but he survived, spending the rest of the war as a POW.  Rejected as a vet, Wade joined Cobra until Stalker and Snake-Eyes convinced him to leave.  Hawk created a new identity for him and his adoptive family, and one day his son, Sean, joined the Joes.  

In the Command Center, Mainframe tells Duke and Roadblock about the Cobra-on-Cobra violence, thanks to the fact he hacked Revanche, underscoring Revanche isn't as much of a threat as I originally thought.  

Meanwhile, Scarlett and Snake-Eyes are together in a mountain cabin in the Sierras.  Snake-Eyes (whose face remains hidden) tries to tell Scarlett something, but she tells him to wait because she heard a sound.  Excitingly, one of Timber's descendants brings a wolf puppy to Snake-Eyes.

Again, it isn't the most thrilling issue, but we're clearly building to something.

Kill Your Darlings #4:  Oof.  I honestly stopped breathing at some point, reading this issue.

The issue opens with a young Rose locked in the dark basement as punishment for something she did to make her mother mad.  It reveals something from the first issue, that Rose's mother wasn't all hugs and pancakes.

In Rosewood, the "Great and Terrible Evil" chases Rose through a cave and into a cavern, where a purple light shines on a mesa.  Evil resurrects some of Rose's former soldiers to attack her, and Rose flees to the mesa, grabbing Francine, the source of the light.  Rose slashes through the undead as Evil continues to ask her why she returned to Rosewood.  Rose confesses what I think we all assumed — she hoped she could somehow bring back her mother.  

Evil then summons her mother (or, at least, a simulacrum of her).  Rose's "mom" promises to take care of her, though Evil comments that she never really did.  We see image's of Rose's childhood:  of her alone watching TV or staring into an empty fridge, of her sleeping in the car outside the restaurant where her mom worked, of her alone in the dark basement.  Her mom is suddenly ablaze and attacks Rose who kills her with Francine.  Evil then tells Rose her mother's greatest legacy — even more than the scars she left — is him and pushes her into a cavern.

Rose suddenly falls through the ceiling of the video store, where some employees are fixing the damage and one is giving testimony to a cop.  She loses consciousness and "awakens" to blood everywhere and Evil ripping apart a cop.  Evil asks if she slept through it, implying Rose lost consciousness when he killed her mother.  Evil revels in his much bigger "playground," threatening to make Elliott watch what he does and telling Rose that Elliott is screaming at what Evil has already done with his hands.  As Evil seems ready to kill Rose, the door's bell rings and Evil turns to see a woman in a wheelchair.  Calling her "master," it seems clear that she's the Girl who Wouldn't Burn.

As I said, oof.  

Star Wars:  Revelations #1:  For an FCBD-style anthology, this issue is pretty solid.  

The best story is the first one, as Salli Georgio, Advocate-at-Large, tries to convince a judge that a Jedi used his mind trick to get Dengar to destroy "half the port district" as a distraction — and that Dengar didn't, instead, have two bottles of revnog in his system when he stole a speeder and committed the damage.  That story is, in and of itself, hilarious enough to merit inclusion but gets better when Lando calls Salli to defend him at his upcoming treason trial.  Ha!  I can't wait to see Salli in action again.

The Darth Vader story also intrigues me, as Vader apparently plans to track down an elite group of Rebel cyborgs to insert Imperial droid cognitive units in their bodies.  Vader developed this plan after realizing that the Emperor cost him years of work when he made him kill his own Death Troopers (in issue #40), but droids aren't capable of absorbing the years of training that organics are.  Vader hopes to put the two together, which sounds terrible and Vader-y.  That said, the best part is when the protocol droid contemplates the horror awaiting the cyborgs — being trapped in bodies that a master controls — and Vader unceremoniously cuts him in two since his comment struck a little too close to home.

The other ones are pretty good, too.  Sliney's artwork and Woodard's colors on the Jango Fett story evoke Marvel's '70s era "Star Wars" series, which is a pleasure to see.  The High Republic story is touching, as Keeve comes across a local using a lightsaber he found to try to inspire hope in the people of Gallimere on the edge of the Nihil Occlusion Zone.

All in all, as I said, it's pretty great for this sort of issue.

Undiscovered Country #27:  Man, every time you think you're going to get a win in this series...

I was wondering how Snyder and Soule were going to meet the timeframe they've laid out every time they write back matter, given we have a number of unvisited zones left but not many remaining issues.  We get the answer here, as Pavel explains to the team that he traveled those lands on his way to them.

Before Pavel tells his story, though, an enraged Janet screams at Chang over his failure to reveal the phone's existence.  When Pavel suggests they go to Aurora, Janet says they have to find Daniel first.  I thought this comment was interesting coming from Janet, though she may see the need for an ally after Chang betrayed her.  At any rate, Pavel suggests Daniel is likely already there and tells his story.

Disturbed by his failure to save his comrades when he was a POW, Pavel resolved to free the people of Zone Destiny or die trying.  Despite thousands dead, Pavel and his allies succeeded after a year.  Pavel then spendt ten years as the war hero he hoped he would be, helping Zone Destiny rebuild itself into a successful society.  But the demon-looking horse arrived for him one day.

Pavel then explains his journey through America.  He describes Zone Glory, which appears to replicate an active war between the United States and the Soviet Union, a war that Aurora would never allow either side to win.  In Zone Economy, we see capitalism run amok, a place Pavel left as soon as he could.  We then pass through a series of zones without comment - Publicity, Ministry, Security, Biology, and Theocracy - before Pavel arrives in Zone Bounty.

Pavel suggests that they've all now seen everything Aurora wanted them to see, and it's time to travel to the heart.  The giant who runs Zone Bounty suggests they can send the train two days earlier than usual.  Before they leave, though, Janet demands the phone from Charlotte and then tells Chang that they are, in no uncertain terms, done.  Meanwhile, Ace, Charlotte, and Valentina thank the giant, noting Bounty is the only zone where they've gotten unconditional help.  

The giant asks them to ask Aurora about the plague, concerned that the locusts will destroy the crop the following year and the entire country will suffer.  They agree and board the train, hopeful about the future.  Ace considers the promise of America, and Valentina notes this train has fed America year after year, as Bounty's residents exported their surplus food without asking anything in return.

Of course, as I see the focus turn to the locusts, I know something bad is going to happen.  It doesn't, because it already happened:  each version of the train is in a ditch, with the locusts hovering above it.

Snyder and Soule, man.

Eight-Month-Old Comics: The December 13 Top-Shelf Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

From the World of Minor Threats:  The Alternates #4:  For how complicated this series was, the ending is pretty direct.

It turns out the Alternates - the ones we've been following through this series - are duplicates of the original team of heroes who entered the Ledge.  Ledgerstone used the ur-Alternates "thoughts and fears" to create the worlds the duplicates inhabited, as we've previously seen in flashbacks.  When the Continuum came into the Ledge to rescue the Alternates, they brought back the duplicates instead.  But ur-Tripper explains that the Alternates' departure weakened Ledgerstone, allowing the ur-Alternates to escape.

At first, I thought Kid Curious would find a way to merge them, but it turns out the originals are the bad guys:  they released Pre into the city to give everyone a chance to live with, "No fear.  No pain.  No gods and no lesser people.  No alternates."  When Tripper points out it's too dangerous ("I've seen some people turn into furniture on this shit!"), ur-Tripper says that it's worth it for, "every other driver who makes it to their destination."  

Crab Louie has enough and attacks ur-Crab Louie, though the Alternates eventually figure out they should switch opponents and use the weaknesses they learned about each other in therapy against the ur-Alternates.  (Man, I hate doppelgänger stories.)  In a desperate move, ur-Tripper crashes the ship into the city; Crab Louie saves the Alternates by convincing barnacles to cover them.  The Pre gas begins to spread, but Kid Curious absorbs it and disappears, "someplace else."  

The story ends with the Searcher joining the group ("I am afraid of what I might become") and Mary Marie rejecting Tripper's romantic interest in order to keep the group together.

I wasn't a huge fan of this series, but it was a pretty solid ending, which makes me glad, given how much I loved "Minor Threats."

Star Wars:  Bounty Hunters #41:  Sacks has to hit a lot of steps to get us from where we are at the start of the issue to its end in a believable way, and I'm glad to say that he does so perfectly.

Haydenn tracks down Losha (somehow) at Kirkeide Station and gives her a backup of Valance's cerebral processor, which contains his memories from right before they met.  Losha notes that Valance won't remember her, and, though obviously upset, Haydenn replies that she'll remember, which is enough for her.  Huh.  (I guess you weren't kidding Haydenn.)  She departs, and Losha and Vulkorah head to Epikonia after Losha gets T'onga's distress message.

On Epikonia, the Scourge has "Valance" preparing T'onga and Zuckuss, along with other organics, for processing, but T'onga swipes the key to her shackles from "Valance" and frees herself and Zuckuss.  (At one point, she exposits the Scourge didn't consider them enough of a threat to blaster-proof the shackles.  It verges on pet peeve #3, but I'll allow it.)  T'onga prepares to take out "Valance," as he'd want, but thankfully can't do it as Vulkorah's tooka cats arrive bearing thermal nuclear detonators (in the most adorable way possible).

T'onga manages to insert the backup and reboot Valance's memories, and everyone marvels that Losha is working with Vulkorah, whose transition to comic relief is welcome but still weird.  (She keeps insisting they're a crew, which they all keep denying they are, though clearly they're becoming one.)  Valance takes out the Scourge's robots, and, at some point, "Star Wars:  Dark Droids" #5 bring us to a conclusion, because suddenly the Scourge's threat fades.

Valance is taken aback when everyone hugs him, and Zuckuss gives him the drawings he made when he thought he was losing his memory.  Happily, he seems to have some memory of Haydenn.  T'onga announces the dissolution of the crew, since Khel has all their credits and they don't have any bounties or a ship.  Zuckuss says he's going to find For-elloem, but Valance asks them to help with one last job:  saving Han.

Sacks has really reinvigorated this series, just in time for it to end.  I'm sad it's ending, but I'm glad we're ending on such a strong note, Vulkorah's new personality be damned.