Six-Month-Old Comics: The August 24 Marvel Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

I'm bailing on both "Captain America:  Symbol of Truth" and "Marauders" because Marvel has pushed beyond where my loyalty to these characters lie.  Both series read as if the editors failed to read them.  I'm not doing it if people paid to do it aren't.

A.X.E.:  Judgment Day #3:  Surprisingly for an event, people act...rationally here.  That said, the issue is confusing particularly after the twist at the end.  

We begin with the new god (a.k.a., the Progenitor) judging Captain America as a failure; he's tried to inspire America to be a better country for the better part of a century, but, despite America's role as the world leader, the world "is what it is," "worse every day."  As such, Captain America is a failure.  This pronouncement doesn't particularly bother Steve, and he urges Iron Man and his cohorts to solve the problem while he calms the world with a speech.

Not unreasonably, the Progenitor's judgment leads Druig to surmise that the Progenitor is judging people based on whether they fulfill their "aims and duties."  As such, he orders the Eternals to step up their campaign against Krakoa so they can fulfill their duty.  After all, as Uranos says, "any deviation is excess deviation."

Elsewhere, Tony and company try to find a way to stop the Progenitor.  Ajak is trying to commune with it while Tony identifies its weak point.  Phastos warns Tony that destroying it would create a backlash that affects the Eternals and destroys cities.  After Ajak and Makkari leave, Phastos warns Tony and Mr. Sinister that killing it may still end up being the only option, even if millions die.  But he warns them that the Eternals would have to try to stop them, given their third principle is to protect Celestials.  

Sinister tells Destiny about the weakness, and she convinces the Quiet Council to send a strike team to take out the Progenitor.  To ensure they don't balk at the prospect of millions dying, the Council withholds that information from the team.  Emma reveals that she's made outreach to the Deviants, who are similar enough to mutants that they can use Krakoa's gates.  They travel to Krakoa to take on the battle with the Hex so the X-Men can go attack the Progenitor.  As Phastos warned Tony, the mutants' attack prompts an immediate response from the Eternals.

Jean successfully hits the Progenitor's weak spot, triggering its destruction.  Jean is the first to realize the destruction isn't real:  they were inside the Progenitor's mind the entire time.  As humanity expresses relief at its survival, the Progenitor reminds them that their heroes aren't above judgment.  He then gives the White Queen, Kor (the Deviant's leader), Destiny, and Mystique "thumbs down."

With Tony and his team realizing that they have no choice but face judgment, Sersi travels to the Exclusion to free Starfox, who's imprisoned there for some reason.  She hopes that he can convince everyone to love each other, which is probably the best shot they have right now, admittedly.

Captain America:  Symbol of Truth #4:  Sam Wilson deserves better than this series.  It's all exposition and randomness.   Oof.

First, Crossbones and his men attack Sam once he enters Wakanda, which you'd kind of think the Wakandans would've prevented from happening.

Second, he delivers a supervillain speech telling Sam all about the White Wolf's plan to engage in a terrorist attack in Wakanda at the same time as telling Sam that he wasn't going to deliver a supervillain speech.  Hi, pet peeve #3!  

Third, when Sam uses birds to subdue Crossbones (yup, Crossbones), Crossbones spills the beans, telling Sam that the White Wolf has infected the Wakanda Forever emigrants (including the undercover Sam) with a virus that vibranium triggers.  How exactly does an inert metal trigger a virus?  No idea.

Fourth, Onyebuchi doesn't explain why Crossbones even bothered to accost Sam if everyone else is already infected with the virus.  After all, if he hadn't engaged him, he'd have no chance of stopping the attack.  

Instead of addressing these weaknesses, Onyebuchi instead spends time on the Falcon B story that that I still don't understand.  

First, Crossbones doesn't seem like the kind of guy to leave a hostage alive, but he conveniently does so here.  Thankfully, it means the Falcon can help the superhuman immigrants when they try to escape the facility.

Second, Onyebuchi conveniently has one of the immigrants explain that they staged the break-out when the guards' numbers dwindled as they left to accompany Crossbones to Wakanda.  Does the White Wolf really care that much about payroll that he left a skeleton crew (heh) guarding superhuman immigrants?

As if we don't have enough hackneyed plot devices in this issue, the issue ends with Sam fighting Black Panther, because apparently it's OK for Crossbones to come to Wakanda but not Sam.

In other words, I'm done.

Marauders #5:  This issue is incomprehensible.  I seriously have no idea what happens.  As far as I can tell, the Marauders get their hands on the timedrive, but it only contains the consciousness of one mutant.  Otherwise, it's just a mess, particularly the art department, which looks like a junior high student handled it.  Thank God Bobby is in "X-Men" now.

Star Wars:  Darth Vader #26:  We've had so many of these issues - where events pass before us wordlessly but show us how they remind Vader of his life as Anakin Skywalker - that it's hard to feel the impact that Pak wants to evoke here.  We're supposed to feel for Vader as he contemplates not only his long history with sand but also his failure to save his mother or Padmé.  Vader drives into the storm to save Sabé, something that elicits laughter from the Emperor.  But Pak leans so heavily into the Kingesque approach, with barely any dialogue, that it feels almost like you'r reading a children's book.  It's time to wrap up this arc, as we're so far from the original story involving Crimson Dawn and Sabé that I really can't remember what it was anymore.

Also Read:  Amazing Spider-Man #8

Three-Month-Old Comics: The July 13 Edition - The X-Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

I'm going to put these issues in what I think is their chronological order, though it isn't the order in which I read them.

X-Men:  Hellfire Gala #1:  Despite its 66-page length, this issue is pretty to the point.

Beyond the naming of the new X-Men team, this issue's most significant development is Moira informing Druig (the Eternal) and an accomplice that the Five are the secret to Krakoa's resurrection protocols.  As we'll see in "A.X.E.:  Eve of Judgment" #1, Druig uses this information as inspiration to remove the "deviant" mutants from Earth.

That said, Moira's other actions in this issue don't particularly make sense.  At the risk of exposing herself to the Krakoans (as she eventually does), Moira inhabits Mary Jane Watson's body in order to attend the Hellfire Gala.  (Mary Jane is apparently Emma's new spokesperson for the Krakoan medicines initiative because it's helping with Aunt Anna's dementia.)  Apparently, Moira's only reason for attending the Gala is so that she can taunt Proteus by telling him that she never loved him, seeing his creation as merely necessary to bring about the resurrection protocols.  Duggan never explains why Moira does so, particularly now.  Given the attention the Gala attracts, it seems she had plenty of other avenues to taunt Proteus.  I assume she had reasons why she did so and did so now, but again Duggan doesn't delve into them.

In terms of setting up later developments, Tony learns from Reed that Charles and Erik stole his memories of suppressing the X-gene, which sets up an alliance between them.  But Tony also informs Emma that they did so.  Scott eventually gets to talk to a reeling Emma, revealing to her that Nathaniel Essex is Dr. Stasis.  he tells her that he and Jean only trust her with this information, which inspires her to tell him about Moira.  She also tells him what Charles and Erik did to Reed, and he shares her concern that they're almost too far gone.

We have other developments whose directions are less clear.  Dr. Stasis appears to invade one of the secret Krakoan facilities where the mutants grow the Flowers of Krakoa that produce the medicines.  I'm assuming Moira told him about its location, though Duggan never confirms that.  At any rate, he not only seems to steal one of the Flowers but also detonate the facility.  Either way, I don't buy it.  Shouldn't someone be guarding it?  I'm pretty sure the Quiet Council knew that Moira was still in the wind.  Since she knows all their secrets, wouldn't they have been more careful with one of the more important ones?  Couldn't they see that the Gala was a perfect time for a raid?

In other words, meh.  For all it seems like we're going to war with Orchis soon, we're actually going to war with the Eternals.  Although I'm stoked that Firestar, Havok, and Iceman joining the X-Men, this promised fight with Orchis is starting to drag out way too long.  We need at least a skirmish soon lest it becomes the X-Men's Kindred.  [Shudder.]

Immortal X-Men #4:  Ugh.  I just can't with this series.  

On the plus side, we finally get somewhere when it comes to the Sinister drama, as Emma relays Scott's discovery to the Council that someone claiming that he's the "real" Nathaniel Essex is Dr. Stasis.  As Emma says, it's hard to tell by his reaction if Sinister knew or not.  He opens a portal to escape to his lab.  Destiny is standing next to where the portal is and, as he passes through it, tells him not to be a coward.  As he prepares to activate a Moira to burn this reality, Destiny's words give him pause.  Instead, he returns to the Council to offer his apologies.  However, as we'll see in "A.X.E.:  Eve of Judgment #1," someone kidnaps him via teleportation before the Council can act.

Also running through this issue is the fall-out from Scott's revelation of the resurrection protocols. Unsurprisingly, Emma has the best answer when an ambassador presses her to give humanity's VIPs the secret.  The response?  "16 million."  It seems a pretty solid position to say that the mutants won't resurrect a human until the 16 million mutants lost on Genosha are resurrected.  That said, the grieving woman who throws pig's blood on Emma after she lost her husband shows that humanity won't necessarily accept said position, even if it's a solid one.

Despite the good, I still find myself suffering through these issues as they mostly involve some arrogant mutant leader expositing all over us.  This issue isn't too terrible because Emma is the least insufferable of them.  I'm dreading when Gillen puts us in Charles' mind.

A.X.E.:  Eve of Judgment #1:  You have to get through a lot of exposition about the current state of the Deviants and Eternals here, but it sets up an interesting enough premise for this event that it's worth it.

After his appearance in "X-Men:  Hellfire Gala" #1, Druig - the Eternal Prime - is advancing two separate schemes in this issue.

First, the Machine that is Earth informs us that the Eternals have three core directives:  1) protect the Celestials; 2) protect the Machine; and 3) correct excess deviation.  According to the Machine, the last one is open to interpretation.  

Druig wants to eliminate all mutants as excess deviations.  As the Machine notes, Druig could rule for a million years as Druig the Merciless if he shows the Eternals his commitment to principles "in a fallen age" by destroying the mutants.  However, Domo's plan to detonate an anti-matter bomb under Krakoa backfires when it turns out Krakoa is part of the Machine.  Druig decides to consult Uranos for some help.

Ikaris, Sersei, and Thena are living in Lemuria to help the Deviants recover from an attack by the Eternals and Thanos.  They've separated themselves from the Eternals since they're reeling from the revelation that the Machine kills a human every time it resurrects them.  For Ikaris, protecting the Machine means protecting humans, and he's working out this contradiction of his existence.

Meanwhile, Druig releases one of Ikaris and company's allies, Phastos, who is also appalled by the secret of Eternal resurrection.  Druig releases him at the request of Ajak and Makkari, two priestesses who want him to determine whether their plans to create a god could work.  Their plan appalls him, but his response inadvertently confirms that they could do so.  The person they plan to upgrade?  Sinister (as seen in "Immortal X-Men" #4).  Why did Druig help?  He's just currying favor with the priestesses before he can find away to mind-wipe Phastos and the other rebels of the resurrection secret.

Again, it isn't the most exciting issue, but Gillen really does a solid job quickly moving us through the Eternals' status quo without making it too boring.  Moreover, as I said, the premise here - of the Avengers between two immortal species at war - could go really interesting places.

Marauders #4:  You guys, this issue is so bad.

It starts OK-ish.  Kate dies (eye roll) saving Bishop from the Kin soldiers as the team makes their way to the Chronicle.  It turns out the Chronicle is a person, so Kwannon reads his mind.  It turns out the ancient (and more avian) Shi'ar stumbled upon the First Mutants' colony (named Threshold) on a pre-humanity Earth.  Furious the mutants defeated their attempt at conquest, they returned with more troops to commit genocide.  But Threshold won again.  This sequence is what the Kin mean by "First Blood."

The Shi'ar then engineered themselves to become stronger and less avian, though I lose the plot after this point.  Per the Chronicle's memories, the Shi'ar returned to confront Threshold a third time, but it had disappeared.  I thought that the focus of the next few issues was going to involve the Marauders trying to find where they went.  Instead, the Chronicle says that the Kin's "prescients foresaw [mutants'] desperate lifeboats in time...and vaporized them on arrival."  What lifeboats?  Previously, we learned that the Shi'ar only survived their first altercation with Threshold because its mutants were scared of space and didn't chase them.  What changed?  Was it the K-T extinction event?  Also, arrival where?  Did they try to flee to the Shi'ar?  Also, the Chronicle was pretty clear that the mutants were gone before the Shi'ar arrived, so how did they also destroy them?

To make matters worse, Cassandra says that some escapees survived and were kept in "timedrives," which were stored on a destroyed Shi'ar base.  As such, Bishop and Cassandra want to travel in time to save them; of course, it turns out the "base" was Asteroid M, and Tempus has them arrive just as Nemesis does to destroy it.

What a fucking mess.  It's one thing for an arc occasionally to lose internal narrative consistency, but Orlando can't even keep this issue internally consistent.  It's just plain bad.

New Mutants #27:  As confusing as this issue could've been, Ayala does a solid job moving the pieces around the board in a followable way.

Young Illyana accidentally turns Limbo - or, at least, her part of Limbo - into Alice in Wonderland, summoning not only Dani, Illyana, Madelyne, and Rahne but also Colossus.  Young Illyana saves Illyana as the Red King (i.e., Belasco) kidnaps Dani, Madelyne, and Rahne.  She, the ever handsome Colossus, and Illyana confront the Red King, and Illyana manages to summon the Soulsword briefly again to break the spell.

She's hesitant to leave her former self to the torture that she knows is coming, but young Illyana assures her that she has to do so so that she can become her, who she'd be proud to be.  She then gives Illyana an acorn she created in her 1983 limited series ("Magik"), though I don't remember why it's significant.  (It's been a while.)

The most compelling parts of this issue are Colossus and Magik's interactions, as they're full of hurt and sorrow.  You have to hope that Ayala is showing us these emotions with the intent on addressing them down the line, particularly as it seems like Illyana might unify her soul next issue.  Belasco's comments about how broken she is makes it seem like her soul is still fractured.  I remember a previous iteration of "New Mutants" tackling this issue, but I don't think we ever got a clear resolution.  I'd love for us to get one here.

Three-Month-Old Comics: The June 8 Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Amazing Spider-Man #3:  Jesus fucking Christ.  I was pretty close to terrified by the end of this issue, so I can only imagine how Peter felt.

The issue begins calmly enough, with MJ's boyfriend heading to Peter's apartment to get him to stop calling MJ.  We hear his side of a phone conversation with MC, in which we learn that he once punched Peter.  This time, he only wants to talk.  Outside Peter's building, he runs into the guy who's been hassling Peter the last few issues to pay his medical bills.  He's surprised to learn that Peter was hospitalized for a few months.  He pays off some of Peter's debt to give him some breathing space, clearly Wells' way of letting us know that he's a good guy.  That said, it's easy to forget that after the next sequence.  

Spidey awakens in an abandoned subway tunnel with his hands chained to his ankles.  Tombstone proceeds to beat him to a pulp.  He asks Spidey why he busted up his deal with the Rose, and Spidey responds that it's simple:  he's a good guy and tries to stop bad guys.

This response sets Tombstone on a long, winding discourse about lions.  When a lion kills a man, scientists try to figure out why he did it.  When a man kills another man, they just throw him in a cage.  I'd argue Tombstone is gliding over some nuances here, but Spidey does what Tombstone wants and asks Tombstone what made him "bad."

With absentee parents, he was constantly bullied, unable to eat because his bullies stole his lunch tickets.  Learning the language of the streets, he filed down his teeth and adopted his whisper, getting his bully to lean into him to hear him, allowing him to attack and bite off the kid's ear.  Tombstone then justifies his descent into crime as making sure he could always eat.  At the start, he's talking about needing to eat in a literal sense.  Later, he's filling his larger appetites.  Again, it's kind of hard to argue that living in the penthouse that we've previously seen is the same as not going hungry as a child. But I'm not chained in an abandoned subway tunnel with at least a probably broken rib, so it's easy for me to say.

Tombstone then reveals his plan.  He has his men dressed as the Rose's men, and they're going to shoot up 125th St.  As such, some good guy will emerge to stop the Rose.  Tombstone adds that he's got Robbie Robertson inbound (as we've seen) because he's going to teach him a lesson about his son taking his daughter.  (I guess he hasn't mellowed after all.)  

In a twist I really didn't expect, Tombstone orders one of his men to kill Spidey.  Wells does an amazing job conveying Spidey's terror as he screams, "Lonnie, stop!  I've learned my lesson!"  It's...a lot.  Lonnie disappears as we see the guy lift the gun in the last panel.

As Nick Lowe said in his page last issue, Spidey's totally dead, right?  Like, I know he isn't going to die, but, man, Wells really sells you on the idea that he may.  In other words, it's a great fucking issue.

Astronaut Down #1:  This series' premise is interesting, though the execution is a little clunky.  

Earth is suffering from a "quantum cancer" that's killed 90 percent of the population.  The remaining humans exist in 22 "barrier cities" that hold off the plague.  We witness one of those cities - "Ohio City"- collapse in this issue, killing two million people in 17 minutes.  

In an attempt to prevent the cancer from happening in the first place, the "NSA" has been trying to send "astronaut's" consciousnesses to other realities.  Of the three astronauts we see selected in this issue, only Douglas manages to arrive in the body of an alternate version of himself.  Based on comments some of the characters make, I think it's the first time that they've successfully done so.  

My only complaint here is that Patrick gets a little preachy when it comes to the "Don't Look Up" overtones.  Craven politicians and religious fanatics opposed addressing the cancer when it first appears in Russia, wasting valuable time that could've produced options to prevent the cancer from spreading.  I'm not saying that it isn't realistic but maybe too soon?  At any rate, the speechifying slows down the story that's already pretty dense with scientific jargon.

That said, I'm hoping that now that we've established the premise we'll get to focus more clearly on Douglas' mission.

Dark Beach #3:  This issue is pretty straight-forward if uninspiring.  

In a flashback, we watch Gordo as he quits college after his mother died.  Gordo believes that she was murdered, and Duke unsuccessfully tries to convince Gordo to help him investigate her death, which Gordo dismisses as naive, that they could get to the bottom of a story the cops don't want told.

In the present, Gordo cajoles Duke into giving him the name of his Ghost Choker dealer so he can get high and try to figure out the old Sun mystery.  Lily finds him in his apartment the next morning and discovers the note that Gordo originally found in Ket's apartment that sent him to her.  (It was on Mayflower stationery.)  She tells him "Bermuda" (which is written on the note) is a ship she and Eve used to visit at the habor.  Before she can say more, Julyus the assassin arrives, so Gordo sends her to the Bermuda.  Gordo manages to trap Julyus in his house and makes for the Bermuda, where he comes face-to-face with a taser-wielding Eve.  

In the epilogue, the scientist from last issue stumbles upon a tentacled creature submerged in some sort of tank.  Dr. Stanley arrives and informs her that it hasn't moved in 300 hundred years.  It's interesting that Ruiz-Unger has added such an explicitly extraterrestrial hook to this series.  I'm really unclear, the best possible way, on where we're going with it.

I'm still curious about the geography of this world. For example, Gordo goes to New St. Louis to get the Ghost Choker.  He clearly doesn't go all the way from Reykjavik to St. Louis though.  As such, we're obviously dealing with some sort of compressed area.  But it's also clearly part of the story so I'm figuring Ruiz-Unger will reveal the truth at some point.

Marauders #3:  OMG, this issue is almost incomprehensible you guys.

At some point in the past, the Kin Crimson tried to assassinate Xavier while Cassandra was in control of him.  I don't recall knowing that Cassandra controlled Xavier during the period he was residing with Lilandra or the Kin Crimson tried to assassinate him.  But, I have bigger fish to fry.  During the attempt, Cassandra conveniently learned of the Shi'ar's Ten Shames as well as the Kin Crimson's Chronicle.  

With the mysterious book that Kate received confirming Cassandra's stories, Xandra declares that she's going to read the Chronicle.  Delphos objects, and Xandra attacks her.  Telling Gladiator to imprison Delphos as a traitor, Xandra announces that she pulled the location of the Chronicle from Delphos' mind:  a "pan-dimensional prison" named the Krag.  But Delphos already warned the other Kin Crimson members, so the Krag guards open fire on Xandra when she and the Marauders arrive.

It sounds straight-forward, but it isn't.  It's a confusing mess of mumbo-jumbo.  I like where Orlando is going plot-wise, particularly with the revelation that the criminally underused Fraternity of Raptors' leadership has remained in the prison for generations. But I'd really like to see this narrative flow more easily than it does here.  Moreover, the Marauders are essentially tertiary characters, which isn't great for a book in theory about them.

Past the Last Mountain #4:  As expected, this issue is brutal.

Kate awakens in the Dragon Lake Medical Center and, once released, finds Simon and Willa, who's seething that Dragon Lake isn't human-free as promised.  Even Kate is surprised at Willa's attitude, noting the magical creatures walking freely among the humans.  Their case worker, Sue, arrives and starts processing their refugee paperwork.  When Sue mentions off-hand that she can help them get jobs, Kate expresses shock that magical creatures live and work side-by-side with humans. When Willa says that they don't want to live with humans, Sue informs them that they don't have to do so:  they can head for the Rockies with the other free magical creatures.  When Simon expresses fear of Goblins in the mountains, Sue tells him not to worry:  they killed all the Goblins.

At this point, Willa loses her mind.  She asks when the humans will deem them enough of a "clear and present threat," like the Goblins, to commit genocide.  Sue somewhat understandably notes just how dangerous Goblins are/were.  But, it's too late.  Willa takes to the skies and attacks Calgary.  The Canadians try to take her in peacefully (because of course they do), but eventually the Defense Minister (a Griffin) orders her killed.  In the aftermath, we learn that Neil is facing federal charges of insubordination, and the Canadians drop off Kate and Simon at the Rockies.  

If the main story is brutal, the "Orc Girl" back-up story is even more so.  It expands on a seemingly throwaway comment Sue made in the main story, about an Orc who became an attorney in the 19th century.  

It turns out said Orc as a boy was swept down the river when trying to keep his more adventurous sister safe after she built a raft.  A group of humans pull him from the river on the other side.  Because humans and Orcs had an agreement to stay on their own sides of the river, the Orcs decline to go rescue him.  Devastated, his sister spends her childhood building a bridge across the river to get him.  She fails to complete the bridge, however, as life takes her along its path.  

Now a married woman, she discovers a token that reminds her of her brother, and she goes to find him.  Leaping from the bridge to the other bank, she makes her way through the human town, where she's stunned to see her brother dressed in a suit at happy hour with his colleagues.  She attacks him and flees, furious that he got the adventure that she wanted and that he never returned for her.  (The last part is pretty dickish, to be honest.)  The story ends with her destroying the bridge she built to get to him.

This series has really been a deep dive into hate and mistrust.  Allor didn't make it cut-and-dry:  not all humans hate magical creatures, and not all magical creatures hate humans.  He could've taken the easy road and told a story where difficult situations make people resort to their racial biases.  Willa is a great example of that, where her mistrust of humans dooms her.  When Canada couldn't promise a perfect world, she became the monster she claimed the humans were.  If you spend some time on Twitter, you know how accurately Allor nailed the current moment in which our society finds itself.  But Kate manages not to take this road, a remind that Willa (and people like her) make a choice to lose themselves in hate and mistrust.

Star Wars #24:  Zahra is too good a character to take off the table permanently, so Soule gives himself a secret door here, as Leia leaves Zahra for a creature to eat.  I usually roll my eyes at that sort of ending, but Soule makes the creature sufficiently fearsome that you can reasonably conclude Zahra died if she doesn't turn up somewhere else one day.  If so, Leia gets justice - not revenge, as she tells Zahra - by ensuring Zahra died forgotten and ignoble.  Zahra thought that she was going to kill Leia and demoralize the Rebellion.  Instead, Vader will only see her failure, stopping short of her goal of destroying the entire Rebel Fleet.  Soule makes sure to contrast the consequences of Zahra's insistence on hogging all the glory with Leia surviving because Chewie and Kes were there to help her.  With Zahra defeated, the Rebellion can now focus on resuming its war on the Empire.

One-Month-Old Comics: The May 4 (2022) Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Marauders #2:  I have to say, I am here for the Marauders-Shi'ar war that we're clearly getting.

Despite occasionally confusing moments, Orlando does a solid job throwing a lot of information at us here without relying on too much exposition.  I mean, the conversation between Delphos and Betel, a fellow Noble of the Kin Crimson, pushes this boundary, as they list the Ten Shames in an IM exchange as if they're discussing them with at uninitiated person and not a fellow Noble.  But, it does what it needs to do.  We learn that only one person can speak about the Tenth Shame and Xandra only knows about the First Shame.  

Orlando does a great job with Xandra, as she both acknowledges to Gladiator that they have to keep the First Shame secret since it's so heinous but is also furious at him (and all Shi'ar) for essentially making her subordinate to the Kin Crimson.  Xandra's horror at just the First Shame makes it clear that the Shi'ar's treatment of the first mutants (I'm guessing involved making them lab rats) was far beyond the pale.  As such, it's hard to empathize with the Nobles' outrage at the mutants' "affront" in trying to discover what happened to the first mutants.  Orlando is setting up a story that involves some comeuppance for the Shi'ar, though I'm not quite sure how it's going to happen.

My only complaint here is that Orlando uses several deus ex machina in the Marauders' battle with Erik the Red.  For example, Somnus can essentially stop time given that his dreamscape exists at a slower pace and Bishop (I think) somehow creates energy helmets for everyone after the ship explodes.

In other words, I like where we're going, but I'm hoping Orlando tightens up some parts.

Spider-Man 2099:  Exodus - Alpha #1:  I'm fucking thrilled to say that this issue is spectacular.  This issue is Orlando's best work in comics.

Honestly, I'm so excited, I don't even know how to begin.  As anyone reading this blog for a while knows, I don't say the following part lightly, but I think Orlando wisely puts aside Miguel's continuity for the moment and keeps the focus on Miguel and Lyla here.  Miguel's (and 2099's) continuity is so confusing at this point that it does no good trying to explain it in a debut issue.  Orlando sticks to the basics, and it's a reminder how good the basics are.

We kick off this new chapter in Miguel's adventures with a man named Bruto Olafsen cutting off a man's arm.  When Public Eye officers try to arrest him, he shows them a black card with white concentric circles, and the officers realize that he's a Cabal pledge.  Bruto tells them that he's just trying to make his numbers when Miguel snatches him.  Bruto is shocked Spidey would take on the Cabal, but Miguel notes that he's just a pledge; Miguel tells Bruno the Cabal was testing him and, if he had passed the test, it would be there to help him.  Realizing Spidey speaks the truth, Bruto says that he's Nueva York's sixth richest man and can pay him.  (This part makes it clear we're not dealing with an organization recruiting from the lower classes.)  Miguel wants the Cabal's leader's name, but Bruto doesn't know it.  Instead, Bruto can only send him to the comms station where Bruto was supposed to transmit his zipgun's thrill counter.  (I love the "thrill counter" idea.)

As Miguel heads to the comms tower, Lyla and Miguel's conversation provides some background on where we are in 2099.  Lyla informs us that the Cabal is the world's only "real" superpower, and I love Orlando deciding to put the days of Alchemax serving as 2099's sole villain behind us.  We learn that the Cabal operates from "Heaven," which I'm guessing is a satellite, and brutally and publicly murdered the Avengers, which has left the world in a state of shock.

Arriving at the comms station, Miguel uses the key that he swiped off Bruto to hack into the system.  He discovers the Cabal has routed a "stellar mass" on a collision course with the Ontario Expanse.  He also learns that the station was going to explode with Bruto inside.  Miguel realizes that Bruto's initiation was a "cruel joke," and I'm intrigued why the Cabal singled out Bruto for such punishment.  Miguel also discovers that the Cabal is scanning the entire planet for some reason but notices some dead zones.  Lyla tells Miguel that the drive has more encrypted files, so Miguel grabs it before the station implodes.

Miguel then heads to one of the dead zones while Lyla scans the news.  The C.E.O. of Green Globe Partners, an activist fund, blames Alchemax for "R&D gone wrong, citing the crash's immediate mutagenic effects on the terrain."  At the dead zone, Miguel discover the Ghost Spire, a tower that Ghost Rider controls and where he protects a city of unhomed, unwanted people.  Zero informs Miguel the crater is birthing new elements and new conspiracies, worrying that the coming fear riots will hurt his people.  Zero agrees to crack the "mysterium datadrive" (a great Easter egg for X-Men fans) but demands Miguel leaves after he does so before the Cabal can track him to the Spire and hurt Zero's people.

In a truly genius moment, the drive is "quest encrypted," which means, to decrypt it, Miguel and Zero have to defeat a digital troll.  I mean, this part is just brilliant.  It wasn't necessary - Zero could've just decrypted it.  But, Orlando adding in this detail shows how carefully he's thinking about each part of this issue's plot.  After defeating the troll, Miguel learns that the "stellar mass" is a dying Celestial, Jovion the Enactor.  The Cabal used the bullet inside him (which they probably shot at him) to pull him to Earth, creating the "weird Eden" they clearly plan on harvesting.  

Before Miguel can learn more, Zero pulls him from the drive as the Cabal has sent a killcraft with shocktroops to the Spire.  As the Spire disintegrates, Zero takes out the killcraft and Miguel engages the shocktroops.  One of the shocktroops tells Miguel that he's a Manfredi (so, again, not a plebe), and Miguel demands to know who the Cabal's leader is.  Before Miguel and the residents can take out the troops, the Manfredi tells Miguel that the leader will reveal himself soon and then uses a "cellular cyanide" tooth to dissolve himself (as do the other shocktroops).

One of the residents demands Miguel helps them now that they've lost the Spire, and he agrees to ferry them to the Transverse City Spire.  Lyla informs Miguel that the Cabal has offered membership to anyone who can stake claim to the Celestial Garden, and Miguel understands that pretty much anyone alive now stands between him and the Garden.  More shockingly, Lyla tells him that the Cabal's leader has, in fact, revealed himself:  it's a very Norman Osborn-looking Green Goblin.

Again, I couldn't be happier with this issue.  I would love for Orlando to keep ignoring most of Miguel's past to create a new 2099 status quo that we could embrace.  I cannot wait for next issue.

Star Wars #23:  Although everything doesn't go exactly as she planned, Zahra reminds us why she's the Empire's best officer in this issue.  In fact, she only fails to take out the entire Rebel fleet -- three full divisions -- and a ground division because two Pathfinders sacrifice themselves to take out the Tarkin's Will's primary reactor.  When Kes and Shara arrive at Home One (the Rebel Fleet's command frigate), Leia mentions celebrating their win, but I think that's just Leia blowing smoke up everyone's ass.  Sure, Zahra lost Tarkin's Will, but the Rebels lost at least three ships by my count as well as most, if not all, of the ground division.  Given the Rebellion's already reduced capacities, they'll miss the ships a lot more than the Empire will miss Tarkin's Will.

Star Wars:  Obi-Wan Kenobi #1:  This series appears to consist of vignettes from Obi-Wan's life, timed to the debut of the Disney+ series.  This issue is fine, if a little lackluster.  

Obi-Wan recalls losing his time as a Padawan, when he lost his friend and protector, Gehren Rand.  After receiving a Force vision of her father in terrible pain, Gehren wants to leave Coruscant to go help him.  Yoda tries to explain to Gehren that the Force may (or may not) be showing her the future, but she decides that she has to leave.  As Gehren is the only person ever to care about Obi-Wan, he follows her.  

To me, I would've preferred to learn more about Obi-Wan as (seemingly) an orphan, since the other "Star Wars" titles have frequently mention how the Empire largely recruits orphans.  The parallel between the Empire and the Jedi would be interesting.

When a gangster Gehren paid to transport her off-world double-crosses her, Gehren and Obi-Wan using their fledgling powers to escape.  Obi-Wan decides against leaving Coruscant with Gehren, and, as he tells us in the present, he never saw her again.  This mini-adventure makes Obi-Wan realizes the dangers of acting from fear (as Gehren was), and, later that night, Yoda tells him that it's time for him to protect himself.

I can't say that the Young Obi-Wan Chronicles interest me all that much.  (Next issue focuses on an adventure with Qui-Gon.)  But, after watching the first episode of the Disney+ series, I'm thrilled to see that Eopie survives so I'll take it!

 
Also Read:  Ben Reilly:  Spider-Man #4; Giant-Size X-Men:  Thunderbird #1; Quests Aside #1

One-Month-Old Comics: The April 6 (2022) Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

All right, I've gotten through enough of my superhero-comic backlog that I can finally start reviewing all my comics at the same time.  As such, I'll start reviewing the "Star Wars" and other "top-shelf" series with the superhero comics.  Onwars and upwards!

Devil's Reign #6 (April 6):  It's weird to be happy that Wilson Fisk gets a happy ending, but Zdarksy's brilliance is what makes that possible.  

After Luke inspires the freed Purple Child to summon the strength to break the Purple Man's hold on New York City, Wilson's plan is in shambles.  He doesn't care, though.  He thinks that he's killed Matt Murdoch, when we know that he's really killed Mike Murdoch.  When Daredevil hears that Mike is dead, he rushes to kill Fisk.  In the end, though, Elektra convinces him not to do it, because he isn't an assassin who strikes in shadows.  (Isn't he, though?)

As Wilson is brought to jail, Butch intervenes and brings him to the Stromwyns.  Wilson violently rejects their "offer" to make him president, potentially killing them in his rampage through their guards.  This entire experience has made him realize that he really just wants to be with Mary.  He tells Butch to tell everyone that Kingpin killed Matt Murdoch and Butch killed him.  

As such, "Devil's Reign" ends with both Daredevil and Kingpin free of who they were.  Daredevil agrees to help Elektra form the Fist, and Kingpin and Mary literally sail into the sunset.  Although primarily a Daredevil story, Marvel isn't wrong, for once, that this mini-series will have serious ramifications throughout the New York City-based hero community.  Fisk is no longer the mayor, and Luke Cage (!) looks set to become the mayor.  

As these events go, Zdarsky did much better than his colleagues before him.  He kept the story focused and didn't trying to do too much.  The story of Kingpin's fall as Mayor was literally years in the making, and I'm really satisfied with the outcome.

Marauders #1 (April 6):  This issue is uneven, but it's a solid enough start for this new team.  I feel like Orlando probably needed two full issues to tell the story that he wanted to tell here, first establishing the new team and its dynamic and then sending them on their first mission.  Then again, after the time that he had to spend establishing that Krakoa has determined Cassandra Nova is a mutant, maybe it was a good idea to end with a bang.  

And a bang it is:  Cassandra reveals that the Shi'ar have been holding the first generation of mutants captive for millennia.  As Kate and company head to the Imperium, Delphos reveals herself to Xandra as Delphos the Red, a member of a secret society created to keep the mutants imprisoned lest the Imperium fall.  She reveals their secret history to Xandra, who's sufficiently terrified of what would happen if the Marauders discover the truth that she sends Erik the Red after them.  

Looking at next issue, I'm hoping that we'll see some tighter art and writing, but, all in all, it isn't a terrible new start for Kate and company.

Spider-Punk #1 (April 6):  I'm hit or miss with Cody Ziglar, but this issue is seriously fun.  Hobie and his Spider-Band of anarchist, BIPOC, and LGBTQ+ super-friends protect Brooklyn from Kraven and the Hunters, who've accepted weapons from a mysterious benefactor to help him gentrify the neighborhood.  It could be eye-roll inducing, but Ziglar infuses the story with enough heart and humor (i.e., "What's the Furthest Place from Here?" was missing) that it isn't.  If you want your Spider-Man a little more cyberpunk and a little more queer, this series is for you.

X-Men Red #1 (April 6):  This series is exactly what I was hoping it would be.  

Ewing uses Storm and Sunspot as our eyes into how difficult trying to fit Earth and Arakko societies together is going to be.  For Bobby, he's excited at the possibility that Arakko brings, looking to become Arakko's premier party planner, essentially.  It's the perfect role for him.  Fuck A.I.M.  Bringing disco to Arakko is his calling.  

But, Earth's misfit toys are causing trouble.  Vulcan loses his shit at the Red Lagoon, Bobby's bar, when a Shi'ar diplomat doesn't recognize him, his former "king."  Before Abigail Brand and Cable can calm down the situation, Vulcan starts waling on Bobby.  Then, Thunderbird arrives and loses his shit and he starts waling on Vulcan.  But, Brand understands the situation and does what I've been saying that the mutants' leaders need to do to keep the younger mutants in line:  Thunderbird and Vulcan just need jobs.

Meanwhile, Ewing shows that Storm is handling her task a little better than Bobby.  As imperious as Isca the Unbeaten is, Storm notes that she constantly abstains and refuses to accept the burden for decisions that Isca wants her (Storm) to accept.  (Because Isca so frequently abstains, Storm often has to cast the tying vote.)  To emphasize this point, Brand proposes that Storm create an X-Men for Mars.  She wants Storm to lead it as Queen of Mars, which leads Storm, as she does frequently throughout this issue, to insist that she's Regent of Arakko.

As these events develop, Magneto strikes up a friendship with the Fisher King, a human born in the Tarn's prisons who lives on one of Arakko's isolated continents.  Bobby later approaches Magneto (with the Fisher King present) about creating a new X-Men team to keep an eye on Brand, and Storm arrives to propose something similar.  Knowing Brand is going to build her own X-Men (presumably with Thunderbird and Vulcan on the team) for her own ends, though, Storm suggests that they are instead the Brotherhood.  Yes!

In other words, it's "John Carter of Mars" meets "Days of Future Past" meets "Blade Runner" meets "Red Mars."  In other words, it's spectacular.  Ewing excels at showing both Storm and Sunspot's strengths and weaknesses in one issue.  Storm's commitment to peace makes her turn an inadvisably blind eye to the Arakkii's true nature, but her experience, insight, and values make her capable of actually bringing about that peace.  Bobby is too optimistic, maybe, but also pays more attention than people think that he does.  Ewing is also putting together characters that we've never really seen interact, which makes it all the more exciting.  I can't tell if Storm is going to hate or love Bobby, but we'll see.

In other words, I am so fucking here for this series.

Also Read:  Moon Knight #10 (April 6)