Guardians of the Galaxy and X-Men: The Black Vortex Omega #1 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

I guess that I have to give Bendis and Humphries credit for the fact that everyone doesn't end this event exactly the same way that they started it.  Beast, Cyclops, Groot, and Iceman surrender their cosmic powers, but still find themselves changed.  Groot and Iceman are physically transformed, and Jean confirms to Storm that Cyclops' "heart" has been changed.  (We don't learn if anything happened to Beast.)  Moreover, the authors really shake up the cosmic landscape.  Although I didn't really notice it in "Captain Marvel" #14, Thane froze J'Son in amber (since Carol used the Vortex to deflect Thane's blast onto J'Son); the Collector takes possession of him here, presumably removing him as a threat for a while.  However, Thane is still promising to get his hands on the Vortex again, and Ronan returns to the remains of Hala swearing to rebuild and get revenge.  (I'm not entirely sure how Thane is going to use the Vortex, since we see Gara flying it into a star here, but I guess that we'll see.)  At the very least, then I'm happy that the authors didn't go the ret-con route that pretty much every event takes lately (particularly an event that Bendis writes), since the landscape is definitely different now.

That said, I can't say that I'm totally happy.  First, the revelation that Gara could use the Vortex to strip the cosmically powered characters of their powers was certainly a little too convenient.  Sure, they were changed on some level, but, seriously, we all saw that coming.  I also wasn't surprised that Angel and Gamora kept their powers, since they're exactly the kind of characters that you would expect to retain their powers; in fact, it seems unlikely that we'll even notice that they're cosmically powered (except maybe for Warren's appearance), since they're pretty aloof anyway.  But, we're never given a reason for why Kitty retains her powers.  Given that she was the one that wanted them the least, you'd figure that she'd be the one first in line to jettison them.  However, she makes no move to do so here; we seem to have to accept that she's stuck with them, but we're not given a reason why she's different from Beast, Cyclops, Groot, or Iceman.  Moreover, despite Gara's warning that these powers basically steal your humanity, Kitty exhibits the entire range of emotions that she usually did, given that she accepts Peter's proposal.

Yup, Peter proposed.  They've known each other for only a few weeks, maybe months, and almost their entire relationship has been spent on different sides of the galaxy, but romance!  Hurrah!  This entire sequence is honestly terrible.  It's forced and awkward, with Humphries portraying all these characters as having close relationships that they don't really have.  (Rocket and Storm as buddies?  Really?)  Without this development, I'd be more or less satisfied with this event, even while acknowledging that it was a pretty lackluster one.  But, this ending just made me roll my eyes and wonder how much longer I'm going to be getting "Guardians of the Galaxy."

** (two of five stars)

Legendary Star-Lord #11 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Once you put the Black Vortex into some sort of emotional context, it's actually not a terrible device.  It's just a shame that it took us eleven chapters to get there.

The best moment of this issue is obviously Peter preventing Jean from submitting to the Vortex, saving her from ever knowing the type of cosmic power that eventually destroyed her future self.  It's chivalrous and heroic, and it's exactly what we'd expect from Peter.  But, the next best moment is the one that we don't expect, when Peter realizes that he also can't embrace that cosmic power, lest he become a super-bro that leaves Kitty heart-broken.  Now, I have to say at this point that I still don't totally buy the Chris Pratt Star-Lord.  I still long for the tactician that fought by Richard Rider's side during the fight against the Annihilation Wave.  But, in the context of the character that Marvel has made him become, this altered vision of himself is probably an accurate one.  In fact, his rejection of that vision gives me some hope that the old Peter may one day return.

In the meantime, Kitty is full of adoration and love for Peter, both for saving Jean and rejecting the Vortex.  It's why she has to embrace it, since she's the only person there that doesn't want that sort of power.  That part also made total sense to me, and, for the first time since this event began, I'm actually excited to see how it unfolds.

*** (three of five stars)

Captain Marvel #14 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

The only thing that the Black Vortex seems capable of doing is turning good writers into mediocre ones and bad ones into terrible ones.

(Sorry.  Between "Convergence" and this event, I'm just tired of DC and Marvel churning out shitty comics and making me pay for them.)

Overall, this story is fine.  Carol grabbed the Vortex at the end of "Cyclops" #12 and she's en route to Spartax so that Kitty can use the Vortex (somehow) to de-amberize it.  Fine.  But, DeConnick is clearly phoning in this issue, because we've got a number of internally inconsistent moments.  The best example is Carol declaring that Thane can no longer amberize anyone simply by pointing at them; he has to actually touch them.  First, it makes no sense that the Vortex would somehow make Thane less powerful.  It's supposed to remove inhibitions, not impose them.  But, Carol also knows better.  Does she really think that Thane touched everyone on Spartax to turn them into amber?  Carol eventually realizes her "mistake," but, to me, it's all just DeConnick thinking, "Blah blah blah, another cross-over event that they're making me do, blah blah blah."

I could point out other problems, but, honestly, I'd really just as soon forget this issue happened so that we can happily return to our regularly scheduled programming next issue.  I'm giving it two stars because DeConnick does what Layman failed to do in "Cyclops" #12, namely use the Vortex as a way for Carol to contemplate her past sins (as Binary) and realize that she's moved past the point that she needs that much power to do good and win fights.  If we had more of those moments in this event, maybe I wouldn't be waiting so impatiently for it to end.

** (two of five stars)

Cyclops #12 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

I...just don't know where to start.

First, I have serious doubts that anyone could possibly recreate a fingerprint so exactly that it could fool a fingerprint scanner.  Second, even if someone could manage to do it on paper (or some similar material), it seems impossible that a teenage boy could do it, particularly when it involved freestyling it under duress with his fairly new mutant power of shooting concussive beams from his eyes.  But, it seems particularly difficult to believe that the concussive beams would be readable to the scanner or that said beams wouldn't have actually broken the scanner.  As such, it makes me wonder WHEN CYCLOPS SUDDENLY GOT HEAT VISION.  Grrrr.

Then, I have no idea why we're supposed to think that the whole insane discussion that Scott has with Corsair in his head is a good thing.  First, Corsair's comments to him are almost verbatim what Emma told Jean in "All-New X-Men" #37.  Moreover, this entire sequence cheapens the story that I thought that Layman was telling.  I totally bought the idea that Scott, of everyone involved, understanding exactly what he says here, that absolute power corrupts absolutely.  He's already panicked about the fact that his older self murders Xavier under the influence of the Phoenix; he's also aware that future Jean fell under the sway of Dark Phoenix.  I figured that he'd prove to Bobby that they didn't need the Black Vortex to win.  (As a side note, does J'Son really just keep the Black Vortex lying around his fortress without a guard?  If so, it was really thoughtful of him to keep it near the prison cells so that Scott and company could swipe it so easily.)  But, instead, he creates some voice in his head to convince himself to ignore himself?  Really?  Again, I initially thought that it was the Black Vortex manipulating him, and I would've been totally OK with that.  But, no, he does it to rally courage?  Also, he chooses Corsair to do that?  I mean, I know that this Scott has a different relationship with his father than "our" Scott, but, after reading issues with Corsair for the last 30 years, I honestly didn't recognize this version of him.  We're talking about the guy that never bothered to check to see how his sons were doing on Earth because he was having so much fun being a space pirate, right?  Again, I get that it's an idealized version of Corsair, since it's from young Scott's perspective, but, come on now.  Also, doesn't this entire sequence show that Scott is maybe in need of some serious therapy?

But, nevermind, we just blast our way outta the Fortress, bro!  We stumble upon the Guardians and Cosmic Angel and Beast fighting the Slaughter Lords outside the fortress, and pitch the Vortex to Captain Marvel so that we can join the fun.  Woot!  Space pirates!  Adolescence!  Party time!  Excellent!

zero of five stars

Legendary Star-Lord #10 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

OK, a lot happens here in pretty quick succession.

J'Son has Thane encase Spartax in amber so that he can sell it to the Brood.  In exchange, he gets control over every tenth planet that the Brood conquer.  Meanwhile, the Brood get to implant eggs in the immobilized Spartaxans, drastically expanding their population overnight.  (The Spartaxans will die in the birthing process, since the eggs are placed in their brains.)  Peter and the Hala team arrive to find the encased bodies, and he tearfully confesses to a fossilized Kitty that she was right about everything.  Kitty manages to phase through the amber, and a sarcastic and tearful reunion ensues.  ("The time to berate you is later.  Just kiss me, space boy.")  Magik and the runaway team members also arrive, but, before anyone can devise a solution to save the Spartaxans, the Slaughter Lords attack!

This event has been pretty uneven, but this issue is one of the better installments.  For the first time, someone seems to have some sort of plan (i.e., J'Son).  (It now explains why he needed Thane, given his ability to case people in amber.)  I'm definitely more engaged than I was after the disastrous "Nova" issue.

*** (three of five stars)

Nova #28 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Are we really supposed to believe that Thane is such an idiot that he thinks that the Guardians and the X-Men killed his followers, not Mr. Knife?  Really?  The problem is that you have to believe it if you're going to believe this issue.  After all, it revolves around Sam accidentally bringing the Black Vortex into J'Son's flying fortress, where Thane is waiting to get his hands on it.  (I was reminded why I stopped getting this series with this development, since Sam seems to be a Looney Tunes character given his ability to do exactly the wrong thing at exactly the wrong time.)  Now, we have a Vortex-ed Thane.  [Sigh.]

* (one of five stars)

Guardians of the Galaxy #25 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Well, that escalated quickly.

This issue starts off pretty modestly.  Carol is trying convince the Supreme Intelligence to allow them to take the Black Vortex to save their friends, and the Intelligence (somewhat reasonably, if you ask me) tells her that their friends made their choice knowing the consequences.  He would really just like to have the Vortex under lock and key again.  (Again, it's really hard to argue with this sentiment.)  The teams realize that the conversation isn't going their way, so they attack the Intelligence and his guards to provide cover to Nova to steal the Vortex.  The problem is that J'Son and the Slaughter Lords arrive.  One of them swipes the Vortex from Nova, and the two spend the rest of the issue trading possession of it between them.

Then, J'Son's fortress eats Hala.

Yup, J'Son destroys Hala.  Schiti does a great job of conveying the gravity of that event, with a two-page spread that really grabs your attention.  The only problem with it is from a narrative perspective.  Bendis never tells us why J'Son felt the need to destroy Hala.  It wasn't to get the Vortex; at the time of destruction, one of his Slaughter Lords already had it.  Bendis seems to make it about revenge, since J'Son blames the Intelligence for his role in his downfall.  To that end, I certainly get his hatred of the Intelligence.  But, are we really supposed to believe that J'Son has so embraced his role as a villain that he's willing to destroy a planet?  Before, he really just wanted revenge on Peter.  It wasn't even like he sent the Slaughter Lords to kill everyone at the orphanage, something that he could've done to toy with Peter's emotions.  He pretty specifically just wanted to get his revenge on Peter.  But, now, he's destroying planets?  It's a pretty big leap.

We're halfway through this event at this point, and I'm still honestly not sure where we're going.  Other than the Intelligence, everyone wants the Vortex, but their motives still aren't really clear.  Sure, Carol argued that she wanted it to save her friends, but we don't know what she planned on doing with it after that.  Does J'Son want the Vortex so that he can destroy most of the galaxy in revenge for losing his kingdom?  It's just a jumble (if not a mess) at this point.

** (two of five stars)

Guardians Team-Up #3 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

The battle for Hala is over pretty quickly here, as Peter helps Ronan defy the Supreme Intelligence and submit to the Vortex.  Ronan uses his new amped-up powers to take out Angel, but it's not really this moment that saves Hala.  Instead, it's when Beast uses his cosmic awareness to create a replica of space-time (so that he can hold all possibilities in his hand) and then realizes that he broke the fabric of space-time when he brought back the younger X-Men.  He flees in horror, and Gamora, now bereft of allies, is forced to cut her losses and flee as well.  (I'll admit that I have no idea how it's even remotely possible to create a "replica" of space-time or why said replica would necessarily include the tear that Hank sees here, but I can't waste too much energy on that).

Looking forward, Thane's discovery that someone (likely J'Son) slaughtered his flock and Gara's arrival on the scene are likely the most significant developments.  It's not clear why Gara (the last of the Viscardi) appeared at the orphanage, but she announces that she's there to destroy the Black Vortex, so she may have just tracked it there.  Thane taking on J'Son also raises the stakes, since the former Emperor now has a number of people gunning for him.

I'm still not sure what Peter and company are going to do now.  They originally went to Hala not just to save it from their three lost sheep, but convince said sheep to join them in attacking J'Son.  Since the sheep have all fled, is Peter eventually going to join forces with Thane?  Plus, Peter also wanted the Black Vortex to fight J'Son, but I don't see the Supreme Intelligence -- who views it as a dangerous object -- just giving it to him.  I guess we'll see.

(Also, Nova appears again this issue, but doesn't say a word.  Weird.)

*** (three of five stars)

All-New X-Men #39 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

First, when did Nova arrive?  As far as I can tell, we haven't seen him in this event, but he appears in Peter's ship heading to Hala.  WTF?

This issue hews closely to the cross-over event rulebook, with the group now splitting into three separate teams as we enter the middle act:  Kitty leads a group to save the kids at the Spartax orphanage (presumably from attackers trying to draw out Peter), Peter leads a group to Hala to save it from Angel, Beast, and Gamora (and try to convince them to help attack J'Son's fortress), and Scott takes Bobby and Groot to the Spartax moon to try to distract the Slaughter Squad so the other two teams can take off safely.  It's a pretty solid plan (except for sending two teenagers and a talking tree to take on a group called "the Slaughter Squad," but I digress).

Bendis does a good job of making it about more than just hitting the usual marks as we build to the conclusion.  We've got a number of star-crossed (pretty much literally) lovers in bad places worried about saying good-bye:  Kitty and Peter, Jean and Scott, Laura and Scott.  Moreover, Corsair (wisely) isn't thrilled with the idea of Scott going to confront the Slaughter Squad.  It adds a tension to the event that it has been missing, since it's pretty much been the usual jumble of characters randomly interacting.

The big question here is how exactly Peter is going to manage to convince Angel, Beast, and Gamora not to be genocidal maniacs.  It was easier said than done when he didn't know that they were destroying Hala.  Now, it's pretty clear that charm along isn't going to do the deed.  Moreover, Thane seems to be haunted by a devil (or actual demon) on his shoulder pushing him to embrace his father's murderous ways, making it clear that Peter may think that J'Son is his only problem, but he'd be wrong.

Again, I can't say that I exactly see why we needed this event, but at least it's getting interesting.

*** (three of five stars)

All-New X-Men #38 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Honestly, I don't have a lot to say about this issue.

Gamora and company take the Black Vortex off Spartax's moon and go to some random planet where they decide to use the Vortex to upgrade the local inhabitant to show (somehow) that it can bring about universal peace.  But, Ronan has (somehow) discovered that they have the Vortex and that they're on said random planet.  He then (somehow) kicks cosmic-powered Gamora's ass and steals the Vortex.  They follow him to Hala and destroy a good part of it while demanding that the Supreme Intelligence return the Vortex to them.  Meanwhile, the rest of the group hides from pursuers (I'm assuming the Slaughter Squad...sorry...Lords) and then escapes on Peter's ship.  They then coincidentally run into Cyclops' ship.

In other words, it's not terrible, but it's also not interesting. The only "moment" during the issue was Angel, Beast, and Gamora being oblivious to the destruction that Ronan wrecked on the random planet, with the inhabitants that they were planning on "upgrading" for their own good mourning their dead.  But, one panel doesn't a solid issue make.

** (two of five stars)

Legendary Star-Lord #9 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Meh.

This issue isn't terrible or anything.  I loved Drax making with the funny ("I have not yet begun to unleash the Grouch!").  It's cool when Angel becomes an Angel of Death, since it's essentially a different but similar corrupted form for him.  (Poor Warren.  Always destined for corruption.)  Storm holding her own with Gamora was also pretty awesome.

But, this arc is suffering from the same problem as any arc where it's obvious a ret-con is going to happen at the end:  it's hard to invest in it emotionally.  (Honestly, I'm wondering if Bendis is even capable of telling a story that doesn't involve a ret-con.)  Gamora, Beast, and Angel are clearly going to revert to their regular selves at some point, so it's hard to be worried about them.  As such, the only tension in the story is whether the Guardians and the X-Men are going to be able to stop J'Son from using the Vortex for his dark ends, and we all know that they will.  (We've also got the shrill Kitty, and it's really not helping matters.)

In other words?  Meh.

** (two of five stars)

Guardians of the Galaxy #24 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

The challenge with this issue is remembering that the characters don't know what we know.  We've seen the Viscardi civilization devour itself because of the Black Vortex.  The Guardians and the X-Men haven't seen that.  As such, their fight over the Vortex makes sense, with one camp -- led by Peter -- arguing that they need the power to successfully fight off his father and his minions -- and another camp -- led by Kitty -- arguing that anything this powerful is bad news.  (Kitty actually doesn't make that argument, but it's implied.)

In other words, the problem in not dismissing Peter as an idiot is that you have to remember that Peter doesn't know about the fate of the Viscardi.  He sees a way to level the odds with his father and wants to take it.  It's easy to dismiss this argument as naive, but Bendis does a good job of defending this position, with Peter reminding Kitty that the rules in space are different than the ones on Earth.

But, at the end of the day, you have to wonder if Peter didn't read comic books as a kid, because the lessons here just seems too obvious.  As Uncle Ben said, you don't get great power without something really terrible happening.  The part that I didn't get was Kitty acting as if Peter suggested that they not only get more power but use it to conquer the galaxy.  She's terribly disappointed in him wanting to use the Vortex, but Bendis doesn't make it clear what moral failing this impulse allegedly reveals to St. Kitty.  As a result, it feels like dramatic tension for dramatic tension's sake.  We'll see where we go from here.

** (two of five stars)  

Guardians of the Galaxy & X-Men: The Black Vortex Alpha #1 (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Humphries covers a really amazing amount of ground in this issue, hitting everything from the history of the Black Vortex to why the Guardians and the X-Men came together in the first place.

First, let me get my complaints on the table, because they're fairly minor.  Bendis is obviously going to have to resolve, in fairly short order, how the original X-Men go from lost in the Ultimate Universe to holding classes in outer space with Professor Kitty.  Bendis actually has two issues of "All-New X-Men" left to tell that story before it has its first cross-over issue (in issue #38), but it's still weird to see them here given where they are in their own book at the moment.  Moreover, I have to say that I was really disappointed with the art.  Some of it is beautiful, like the scenes on Viscardi.  Some of it, however, is just horribly rushed.  I'm not Anka's biggest fan, but it's not entirely his fault.  He and McGuinness have very different styles, and the transition between the two of them is jarring, to say the least.  The number of inkers doesn't help matters, given us a larger number of combinations than advisable if you're trying to keep a consistent art style.    (That said, Rocket riding Lockheed is pretty much the greatest thing to happen in comics ever.)

Now, let's get to the good.  Humphries uses flashbacks to the creation of the Black Vortex to great effect, showing how a Celestial created it at the request of a frustrated young Viscardi, named Gara, who hoped that her species would one day reach the stars.  It seems clear that, when one submits to the Vortex, one becomes an idealized form on oneself.  However, we learn that this version comes with incredible darkness, obvious from the destruction that occurs on Viscardi after Gara submits to the Vortex.  It raises some interesting questions about the impact that it's going to have on Gamora, as she submits here to the Vortex for the power to fight off the Slaughter Lords (as the Squad is now called after getting their own Vortex-induced upgrades).  Humphries doesn't answer why the Celestial granted this boon to Gara or if he knew that it would corrupt as completely as it clearly does.  I hope that we get those answers in this event, since it really lies at the heart of the story.

In the present, Humphries picks up where we last saw Kitty and Peter, in "Legendary Star-Lord" #9, as they go about trying to steal the Black Vortex from J'Son.  They successfully do so, but no longer for a lark:  they overheard enough of J'Son's attempt to get Thane to submit to the Vortex to realize that it's dangerous.  I'll note that we still don't know much about J'Son's plan; for example, we don't know what this "one job" that J'Son wants Thane to do for him is.  But, it's enough to freak out Kitty and Peter, causing them to call for help from their respective teams.  They also call in Hank to take a look at the Vortex, and Storm comes for the ride (and conveniently becomes the one to realize the Vortex's evil when she sees a reflection of herself as a goddess that goes Phoenix on a planet).  At this point, the plan seems to play keep-away with the Lords, but I'm sure it'll get more complicated as we go.

In other words, Humphries establishes the threat, gets all the players on the same board, and maps out the initial phase of the story.  Away we go!

*** (three of five stars)