*** (three of five stars)
Favorite Quote #1: "Remember when you were heading down the wrong path? You were this close to being a full-on Avenger." -- Wizard to Sandman, reminding him that he "helped" him in his darkest moment
Favorite Quote #2: "And when you were probably takin' violin lessons...this's what I learned on the schoolyard. [...] Stupid Know-It-All. Now here's where I'd pants you...and throw you in the girls' locker room." -- Electro to the Mad Thinker, at his scrappy best
Summary
At the Sinister Six's underwater headquarters, Electro and Mysterio transfer Doc Ock's body into a new suit that will keep him alive, given that his body has just "died." Elsewhere in the HQ, Rhino and Sandman engage in some training, with Sandman saying that it'll help them actually win (given that he's tired of losing). Sandman reveals that Doc Ock has offered to help him get back his daughter if they're victorious, though Rhino declines to say what Doc Ock has promised him. Their session is interrupted when Chameleon sends a message from the field, confirming that he's infiltrated the Intelligencia and that their doomsday weapon is complete. In Russia, the Winter Guard attempts to capture the Intelligencia at an abandoned factory, but discover they're not there. The Intelligencia then reveal their hand, using their doomsday device (the Zero Cannon) to teleport the Guard into space. At their headquarters (Geo-Base 1 in the North Pole), they celebrate their success, only to be interrupted by the Sinister Six's attack. Chameleon is revealed to have impersonated Klaw, and shoots out M.O.D.O.K.'s psionic blaster. Wizard takes down Chameleon, while Doc Ock and M.O.D.O.K. engage in battle. They decide to move their fight to a "mind versus mind" battle, namely a game of zero-gravity chess, using their men as pawns. The Mad Thinker sends his Awesome Android against the Rhino, and then fights off Electro by disabling the upgrade he made to him. The Red Ghost and his apes attack Mysterio, but are frustrated to discover that Mysterio has employed a number of hologram against them. Sandman and Wizard decide not to fight, given their connection through the Frightful Four. Wizard offers to help Sandman get back his daughter, but Doc Ock blasts him into space before he can accept the offer. M.O.D.O.K. attempts to blast Electro, but, after defeating the Mad Thinker with an...ahem...innovative maneuver, Electro tosses him into the portal. The Rhino does the same with the Android, though Sandman saves him from going through the portal as well. Someone (Doc Ock or M.O.D.O.K.) sends Red Ghost through the portal (after it's revealed that Mysterio had been in the Octobot the Sinister Six used to crash the HQ the entire time), and M.O.D.O.K. surrenders, acknowledging that Doc Ock has a superior intellect. When Mysterio and Sandman ask why they bothered saving the world from the Intelligencia, Doc Ock responds it's because he didn't want to get beaten to the punch.
The Review
I'm honestly not sure how I feel about this issue. On one hand, I loved that Slott gives us a Spidey-less issue dedicated to an Intelligencia/Sinister Six grudge match. Slott juggled 11 (well, actually, ten, because we never see the real Klaw) super-villains and managed to keep them distinct, showcasing their different abilities and personalities. On the other hand, I found the Doc Ock/M.O.D.O.K. chess game down right confusing. As such, I'm giving the issue three stars, though I'm very much excited about the eventual return of the Sinister Six!
The Really Good
Slott somehow manages to give us better characterizations of all the villains in this issue than possibly anyone ever. All in one issue! You could really see the care he gave the issue with the conversation between Sandman and the Wizard. Rather than just making everyone villainous all the time, Slott shows that some of the members of these teams have some humanity left. Sandman has been the villain with a heart for a while now, and I'm glad Slott took the time to show how he's different from most of his colleagues. Along those lines, I was also glad to see Sandman save the Rhino. Conversely, the Electro/Thinker battle was great, because, if Sandman has always been a bit of an occasional softie, Electro has always been a scrappy bully. I loved that he solves the problem of the Mad Thinker stripping away his power by kneeing him...you know...there.
The Good
1) I loved that Slott gave us a Spidey-less issue. I hope Bendis is reading this issue somewhere and realizing that it's a great example of how you successfully set up a future story. One of my problems with the whole H.A.M.M.E.R. war in "Avengers" and "New Avengers" is that Bendis never really took the time to show us Norman working behind the scenes. As such, everything seems abrupt. It's why it's so hard to understand why the public has turned against the Avengers, because it happened suddenly, without any real reason. Slott, however, is a master of building these sorts of plots. He did so with the "Infested: The Road to 'Spider-Island'" secondary features that ran in "Amazing Spider-Man" for months before "Spider-Island" and he does so here. Bendis seems to think that these sorts of preambulatory stories ruin the surprise, but Slott shows here it doesn't. Just like we ended "Infested" without really knowing the Jackal's plans, we also really have no idea what Doc Ock is planning. We just know that he didn't want the Intelligencia to steal his thunder. It's a perfect set-up story, and it shows how Slott has real long-range plans for Web-Head!
2) Moreover, I was thrilled to see Slott gave the Sinister Six a base! It's like their own Legion of Doom HQ! Slott is a genius when it comes to these sorts of simple tweaks (like Pete getting a job at Horizon Labs) that manage to allow the characters to fulfill all their potential. You're left to wonder why the Sinister Six have never before had a base or trained together (or, really, worked together). Awesome.
3) Ramos should be required, by law, to draw Spider-Man forever. Seriously, I love him. Actually, I love that we get Slott and Ramos on this title and Wells and JMad on "Avenging Spider-Man." I feel like, for the first time in years, Marvel is finally giving Spidey his due and putting its best talent on his titles. The Golden Age indeed!
The Bad
The Dr. Octopus/M.O.D.O.K. chess game was...confusing. I'm not really sure why using the Zero Cannon was a proxy for their respective intellects. How would accurately maneuvering the Cannon prove that someone was more intelligent than someone else? Moreover, M.O.D.O.K. doesn't really seem to understand how to use the Cannon, despite having invented it. Doc Ock managed to blink out the Wizard pretty successfully, but M.O.D.O.K. seemingly just keeps the Cannon's portal open, rather than aiming it, allowing the Sinister Six to throw several members of the Intelligencia through it. Why would he do that? Based on the green energy field that appears behind Electro while he's fighting the Mad Thinker, it seems like M.O.D.O.K. planned on sending Electro through the portal. However, once Electro threw the Mad Thinker through it, wouldn't you think M.O.D.O.K. would've closed the portal? By keeping it open, he allows the Rhino to throw the Thinker's Android through it as well. Don't you think the "person" who invented the device would've been able to use it more effectively? Then, I'm equally confused by how the Red Ghost disappears. Is that Doc Ock's doing? Was it his turn? Or, did M.O.D.O.K. accidentally do it? I know this whole section seems really nit-picky, but I was definitely distracted throughout the issue as I tried to sort out these questions (and a little frustrated when I couldn't).
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