** (two of five stars)
Summary
The X-Men end a "holocall" with Ravage, who did not like the "threatening attitude of those arrogant young punks." He reveals that the X-Men want a disc that he liberated from Alchemax that may have something to do with their "missing friend." Suddenly, one of the X-Men bursts into Ravage's office. He tells Ravage that "Meanstreak's" friend, Jordan Boone, has disappeared after compiling incriminating evidence on Alchemax's problems with Valhalla and demands that Ravage tell him where Jordan is. However, Ravage transforms, telling the X-Man that he knows nothing about Jordan, but is willing to give him a fight. The X-Man is tempted, but notes that fighting Ravage won't help him find Jordan or "bring down that ecological nightmare, Valhalla!" Realizing that the X-Man isn't a friend of Alchemax, Ravage suggests that they cease hostilities and talk, just as the other two X-Men, Meanstreak and Krystalin, arrive. Ravage tells them the little he knows about the disc and they tell him what they know. They all agree that they have to go to Valhalla to get answers, and Ravage commandeers a ship to get them there. Meanstreak wonders if their goal is to take down Valhalla, but Ravage notes that, although he also originally planned to do so, the ecological consequences would be too severe. He notes that it's the "long wave generators" causing the problem, and, if they can replace them, they can solve the problem. He mentions that his uneasy ally, Doom, might be able to help him neutralize the threat. Meanstreak balks at Ravage's leadership, but the X-Man who was first fighting Ravage, Bloodhawk, and Krystalin encourage them to put aside their "absurd male posturing" and get the job done. They arrive above Valhalla, only to encounter the Public Eye. One officer asks his supervisor if they're "the official Valhalla heroes," and the supervisor informs him that they're the "mavericks" they've been "warned about." The Public Eye attacks and the X-Men take down the officers while Ravage steals a flybike and heads to Valhalla. He looks to meet Doom to break through the "stasis skin" of the generators and destroy them, assuming Doom will find a way to keep the city aloft. Heimdall sees Ravage arrive and prepares to attack.
Meanwhile, the Punisher is holding a gun on Spidey so he can keep his attention focused on the Punisher while he talks. The Punisher informs Spidey that he was fighting "a crazed beast" on Valhalla when he saw Spidey take on Thor and observes that, based on his checking, "things aren't the way they seem" on Valhalla. He mentions that he's not sure who to trust, but Spidey says that, based on what he knows about the Punisher, they're both the good guys, standing against "Alchemax, Valhalla, and the so-called Aesir." The two decide to take the Public Eye flybike that the Punisher has stolen to Valhalla. On Valhalla, Heimdall attacks Ravage. When Ravage mentions the impact of Valhalla on the environment, Heimdall seems aware of it, noting that the destruction of a few fish is an acceptable price for the "greater glory of the gods." Ravage realizes that anyone willing to destroy nature to boost his ego isn't a god and redoubles his attack. Heimdall knocks him to the ground and, before Bloodhawk can launch a sneak attack, Heimdall attacks, proving his point that he's all-seeing. Krystalin and Meanstreak also arrive and Heimdall mentions that Loki warned him that they'd come. Krystalin hypothesizes that Jordan might have become one of the Valhalla gods; Loki, watching the battle elsewhere on a monitor, comments, "If only you knew, my dear..." While the X-Men fight Heimdall to get more information on Jordan, Ravage leaves the scene to meet Doom, running into Hela on the way. The two battle, and Ravage manages to land a punch. Hela asks how he, "Paul-Philip," could hurt her and Ravage realizes that it's his secretary, Tiana. He tells her that he didn't intend to hurt her and she grabs her "Death Rake" and attacks him again. Ravage is reluctant to hurt her, but tries to defend himself. He attempts talking to her, but she refuses to engage, saying that she's no longer the weakling who fawned over his every word. He tells her that he never thought of her that way, telling her that he saw her as "sensitive...intelligent...kind..." but she keeps on attacking. He tells her that she's being used and that Valhalla is going to kill millions of people if it's not stopped. Hela knocks him from her, telling him that he used her because he knew that she loved him. He tells her that she's trying to establish her own identity at his expense and that she's wrong to do it. He promises not to defend himself, being willing to lay down his life to prove it. She tries to kill him, but can't. She sobs and he tells her that it was worth risking his life because he believes in her. She admits that she hasn't thought through her involvement with the Aesir and he offers to help. She rejects his offer, saying that she can't trust him if she can't trust herself. She leaves and Ravage departs to bring down Valhalla.
The Review
The main drawback of this issue is not just that it begins in media res, but that it also doesn't do a great job of filling in the details as we go. As a result, I spent most of the issue feeling like I was reading the series in the wrong order. However, Mills and Skinner manage to tell a compelling story, giving us our first real hints that Alchemax is, in fact, behind the appearance of the Aesir. We learn that Hela and (presumably) Loki are Tiana and Jordan, both employees of Alchemax. We also hear the one Public Eye officer mention the "official Valhalla heroes" to the other one. It doesn't explain how Alchemax gave the Aesir powers, but, given the genetic research that created Spider-Man, Venture, and the corporate raiders from the Spider-Man story in "2099 Unlimited" #2, it's pretty easy to believe Alchemax found a way to create a bunch of "gods."
The Good
To be honest, I felt the need to throw in a "Good" here, because I didn't hate this issue, despite the coordination problems. It moved at a good pace and did at least forward the central plot, even if it left you scratching your head at points.
The Unknown
1) I wonder to what extent Alchemax knows of the ecological troubles of Valhalla. We don't get told here how the X-Men learned of the problem, so it's unclear to me if Alchemax knows that Valhalla is the imminent ecological nightmare that Ravage and the X-Men seem to think it is.
2) If Boone is indeed Loki, why would he warn Heimdall that the X-Men were coming, if the X-Men were his friends?
The Bad
1) The first two pages of this issue are the most problematic in terms of getting dropped in the middle of the story with little to help us understand. We learn that the X-Men have just ended a call with Ravage, though we can only guess that the call had something to do with the "missing friend" that he mentions. He refers to the disc he "liberated" from Alchemax, but we don't learn why or how he "liberated" it. We see Bloodhawk burst into Ravage's office, raising the question why the X-Men called Ravage if they were close enough to "visit" him in the first place. Then, we learn that the disc that Ravage has does have something to do with the "missing friend," but we still don't learn why Ravage has it. In fact, Ravage tells Bloodhawk that he doesn't know anything about Jordan, making it all the odder that he would have his disc.
2) I thought it was weird that Krystalin, upon hearing Loki's name, goes from not recognizing the name to hypothesizing (correctly) that he's Jordan. Given the main problem with most of this issue, that a number of the plots originated in previous issues, it's unclear if something happened before this issue that would lead Krystalin to think of Jordan when she heard Loki's name mentioned. But, to be honest, it seems more like sloppy writing to me.
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