** (two of five stars)
Favorite Quote: "We do offer a comprehensive health plan. Here, have some herbal tea." -- Hector to Sajani, who's noting the crazy things that've happened to her since coming to work for Horizon
Summary
The Lizard, still in Dr. Connors' body, continues to fail in his attempt to find a way to return to his Lizardform. He realizes that he needs to gather up more equipment, so he cuts off his re-grown arm and departs Morbius' lab (though not before feeding a Lizardified Max his arm). Carlie asks "Dr. Connors" where he's going and he tells her that he's left some experiments running in the lab. Bella then helpfully offers him use of her lab. Elsewhere, Morbius bites into Peter, who manages to extract himself from Morbius' grip. However, he's then distracted by Madame Web, whose astral projection tells him that events are right now being set in motion at Horizon Labs that will result in his destiny being "nothing but ruin and despair." Still elsewhere, the Kingpin spars with Hand ninjas in Shadowland while on a conference call with Tiberius Stone, his mole at Horizon. He reminds Stone that he has yet to deliver the goods that he agreed to provide the Kingpin. An eavesdropping Hobgoblin offers to take care of Stone, a threat that inspires Stone to try to resolve the situation. While breaking into Max's lab, Stone exposits that he had offered the Spider-Sense Jammers to the Kingpin but the previous schematics that he swiped were incomplete. Using the knowledge of Horizon's security systems that he gained as a result of helping Max to Spidey-proof the Labs, Stone begins to reboot the security system, which should theoretically unlock every lab. However, while he's waiting, he rummages through the office and finds the full schematics. Satisfied, he leaves Max's office before the reboot is complete.
In Bella's lab, the Lizard learns about the wonders of pop music while Bella identifies an enzyme that could help prevent a compound from blocking some of the receptors (or something involving science) and "Dr. Connors" synthesizes the Lizard Formula again, using it on Bella. Elsewhere, Madame Web stresses to Spidey that he has to return to Horizon, implying that his life depends on it. Spidey tells her that he can't, because lives depend on him stopping Morbius. Madame Web says that she knows that he's driven by Silver Sable's death, but tells him not to worry about it, because Sable isn't really dead. Distracted, Pete accuses her of lying to get him to do what she wants, a charge she (eventually) denies. Morbius escapes, desperate to sate his hunger, but Spidey captures him before he hurts anyone. At Horizon, Grady introduces "Dr. Connors' to 3-D modeling and Cajun Spicy Ranch Doritos. On a street somewhere, Spidey defeats Morbius and instructs the NYPD to call for a superhuman containment vehicle and three pints of blood. One of the cops balks, noting that Chief Pratchett wants Spidey in jail, but another cop (and a bystander) calls Spidey a hero and gives him his jacket to cover up his badly damaged suit, telling him that it's the least he can do given all that Spidey has done for the cops over the years.
At Horizon, Uatu visits "Dr. Connors," who cuts off his newly grown arm (again) before talking to Uatu to make sure that no one realizes what's happening. Uatu asks "Dr. Connors" why he's been avoiding him and the Lizard, seeing Billy's face instead of Uatu's, panics. Uatu confuses "Dr. Connors'" expression with exhaustion and introduces him to video games to help him let his mind wander. The Lizard enjoys the game and realizes that he needs mutant-growth hormone to create superhuman cells that can attack "normal enzymes...breaking past the genetic locks in Morbius' cure." He sees Billy again and thanks Uatu for helping him fix the formula. Uatu offers to come help, but "Dr. Connors" (or Dr. Connors) refuses worriedly, telling him that he's a good boy. He then runs into Carlie, who realizes that he's now missing his left, not right, arm. (Oops.) "Dr. Connors" makes a break for it and, at that moment, Stone's reboot of the security system frees the Lizardified members of Horizon's think tank. In the Atrium, Hector offers Sajani some tea, assuring her that she'll be fine after falling victim to Morbius, just as the Horizon Lizards attack. Hector activates the new protocol that they established to ensure that Horizon doesn't threaten New York City (after promising the Mayor as much). Spidey manages to arrive by crashing through a window just before the steel panels seal off the building. Elsewhere at Horizon, Carlie is attacked by Bella, Grady, and Max, buying "Dr. Connors" some time to escape. However, before he administers the treatment on himself, he pauses, wondering if he really wants it.
The Review
This issue probably doesn't deserve two stars; after all, two stars for Slott is probably five stars for Lobdell. But, this issue felt flat to me. As I mention below, Slott tries to do too much at the same time. He resurrects the Tiberius Stone sub-plot, adds in Madame Web, and gives us a cartoonish montage of the Lizard realizing all the great things that humanity offers. To do so, he rushes Spidey's fight with Morbius, which seems like an afterthought here, despite seeming like the whole point of this issue at the end of last issue. I think Slott can right this ship pretty quickly next issue, so hopefully this one is just an aberration.
The Good
Slott seemingly ties up the Silver Sable loose end here, with Madame Web telling Peter that he shouldn't feel guilty for her death because she's not dead. Slott leaves open the possibility that she's lying merely to get Peter to Horizon Labs all the more quickly, but it's probably as definitive of a statement that we're going to get on the subject for a while.
The Bad
1) The Kingpin/Stone/Madame Web sub-plot felt really shoe-horned into this issue and I still don't really understand the reason why Slott added. It seems that he did so merely as a way to get Pete to return to Horizon Labs before Hector activated the lock-down procedure. But, I'm pretty sure Slott could've achieved that outcome in a number of other ways, such as Carlie calling Peter for help or Peter returning with a defeated Morbius. Instead, we get Madame Web interrupting Spidey during his fight with Morbius, turning the main draw of this issue -- the fight that was just beginning to build in intensity at the end of last issue -- into a side show. If I thought that this sub-plot was going anywhere, I would probably accept the marginalization of the Spidey/Morbius fight as an acceptable loss. But, I have a hard time believing that Spidey's identity is really going to be compromised. Although Slott might go somewhere else with it, the unlikelihood of this sub-plot resulting in anything significant made it feel like an unnecessary distraction (just as Pete said).
2) Speaking of the Morbius fight, we left Peter at the end of last issue seemingly on the verge of killing Morbius, convinced that he was a menace to society. Here, he seems to get over that rage and simply leaves him with the cops. I'm certainly glad that Peter didn't kill him, since, given his current mental state, I'm pretty sure that decision would've driven him over the edge. But, it's another abrupt departure from the tone of last issue and Slott doesn't really give us an explanation for it, other than the fact that Spidey is now suddenly convinced by Madame Web to return to Horizon Labs. But, isn't it likely that it would've been quicker to stab him than capture him?
3) Just as disappointing as the Kingpin/Stone/Madame Web sub-plot is the fact that I really didn't buy the Lizard's sudden embrace of his humanity. Slott makes it pretty clear (at least for this issue) that the Lizard is feeling human emotions, as opposed to Curt Connors asserting himself over the Lizard. As such, his embrace of certain aspects of his newfound humanity -- pop music, junk food, video games -- felt cartoonish to me. Slott really wants me to believe the Lizard's moral dilemma -- to return to his Lizardform or not -- but instead I just found myself rolling my eyes.
The Really Bad
Max Modell just has the schematics for the Spider-Sense Jammers in his desk drawer?
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