Thursday, March 24, 2022

Two-Year-Old Comics: The Superhero March 11, 18, & 25 and May 27 (2020) Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Hawkeye:  Freefall #4 (March 11):  Rosenberg's script is great, but Schmidt's pencils take the cake here.  I'd love for him to take over "Amazing Spider-Man."  If I can't have that, though, I'm thrilled that he continues delivering shirtless Clint action.  Anyway, enough thirst, onto the story...

In order to throw Falcon, Night Thrasher, and Winter Soldier (the Ronin "task force") off the scent, Bryce hacks into S.W.O.R.D.'s database and finds a Skrull who can impersonate Ronin while Clint is Hawkeye.  The Skrull in question winds up being a subway breakdancer, which adds a whole new level of hilarity to the story.  Of course, it's Clint, so this already complicated plan gets even more complicated when D-Man, Mockingbird, and U.S.Agent join the task force.  

Clint gets paired for patrolling with John, who he was to knock unconscious as John reminisces about their West Coast Avengers days.  Once again, it's Clint so even this complicated plan gets more complicated when Clint's LMD shows up dressed as Ronin because he overheard Clint setting up this plan.  Clint has to kill his LMD and switch costumes with him so that the Skrull can now be Hawkeye since the Skrull definitely can't take on the remaining task-force members as Ronin.  That said, I'm still not sure what Clint's original plan was.  Was the Skrull supposed to just run by the task-force members as Ronin and then pretend to be someone else?  Oh, Clint.  Never good with the plans.

Of course, even this plan doesn't work.  It turns out Spidey followed Clint and knows that he's Ronin (even though Spidey technically followed the LMD).  Although Clint convinces Spidey to trust him "as a friend," their conversation takes so long that the task force disbands for the evening without ever seeing Hawkeye and Ronin in the same place.  Oh, also, Bullseye appears at the end to threaten the Skrull.  Good times.  

New Mutants #9 (March 11):  With Roberto staying with Sam, it seems like the two New Mutants teams who've shared this series are now merged, forming ad hoc teams for missions.  That said, despite their decision to help a mutant who's gone missing in a former Soviet satellite nation, the Council didn't actually ask them to do so.  In fact, Cyclops previously called in Magik to express the Council's concern over the Nebraska debacle.  At this point, it seems like they're replicating what the Marauders do, but without Council approval.  In typical New Mutant fashion, it goes poorly.

X-Men #8 (March 11):  I had forgotten (if I ever really noticed) that Rahne swiped the space egg in "New Mutants" #2, but Hickman reminds us that she did when he sends hordes of Brood to Earth to retrieve it.  Oopsie.

It turns out that it's a King Egg, whose emergence causes the thousand Brood queens to go to war.  Cyclops wisely takes the egg, Broo, Havok, Marvel Girl, and Vulcan to Shi'ar space.  Meanwhile, a Kree Accuser has worked over the Starjammers, and they direct him to Bobby who promises to turn over the egg so long as the Accuser stops bothering him.  Of course, Smasher isn't thrilled when it turns out the Accuser is in Shi'ar space, and Kallark and Kubark (yay!) put aside their Brood hunting trip and make their way to the Accuser.  In other words, space war!  

Although this issue is occasionally hard to follow, it's still fun and hopefully Hickman actually continues the story next issue.  To be honest, though, I'm most interesting in hints across the various X-titles that paradise is turning into debauchery for many mutants, notably Boomer and Vulcan.  Hickman seems to be building to something, and I'm intrigued to see where he goes with it.

Captain America #20 (March 18):  I knew General Ross wasn't dead-dead, but I also didn't expect him to turn up working with Black Widow to track down Sin and the Watchdogs.  It'll certainly make it easier to prove Steve didn't kill him.  Right now, though, Coates is focusing a different story.  He's returning to the story that he and Nick Spencer before him have been telling, about a world where people like Selene can manipulate men who long for the days when men were men.  Selene has set up shop in a town dedicated to helping men rediscover their manhood through hard work and frequent religion.  Of course, she's really running, as Bucky says, a multilevel-marketing scheme where, if you don't bring in more souls, she takes your soul.  Steve notes the similarity to the town that he encountered earlier in this series dedicated to manufacturing Nukes, and he wonders what Selene is hiding here.  I'm guessing that it isn't good.

Guardians of the Galaxy #3 (March 18):  Ewing is building to something here, and I'm totally game.  But, it's confusing.  

First, "our" Moondragon talks to her father, Drax, about how it's unclear who he actually is, since the real Arthur Douglas and Drax the Destroyer stayed in the Soul Gem in "Infinity Wars" #6.  Second, "our" Moondragon is dealing with the fact that the more heroic Moondragon and Phyla-Vell are active Guardians.  Finally, everyone keeps calling Rocket "Ranger Rocket," which may or may not imply that we have a second Rocket in the mix.  As I said, it's confusing.  But, Ewing is doing a solid job of making it clear that we have a mystery afoot so I can be patient.  

The best part of the issue is when it takes you a while to realize that everyone is saying "I am [their name]" because we're seeing Groot talk.  It happens when Rocket informs Gamora and the team that Peter has died and Gamora (as we learn later) expels Rocket from the team.  Given we all know that Peter is going to return, Ewing's use of this approach somehow really amps up the moment's emotions, as we can only watch their grief unfold.

Amazing Spider-Man #42 (March 25):  This issue should hit me square in the feels.  We learn that Gog is actually a space prince's pet who managed to return to him in time to see him die on the battle front.  Oof.  I can't tell why I didn't feel anything, though.  It's part of the problem that I've had with this series for a while.  Despite the fact that I generally like the plots themselves, something about the execution feels color-by-number.  It could be Ottley's spare art, which I find too spare at times.  I feel like someone like Russell Dauterman, Stephanie Hans, or Jamie McKelvie would have left me a broken shell of a human being.  Instead, all these stories feel disposable to me, like I'm just reading reprints of previous issues.

Amazing Spider-Man #43 (May 27):  OK, issue #42 may not have done the job for me, but I felt all the feels when Gog koala-ed himself on Peter.  Spider-Gog!  Spencer's narration is key, because I didn't really buy it until Peter talked about how both he and Gog know what it's like to lose someone but try to do the right thing anyway.  Peter isn't replacing Gog's boy, but Gog isn't alone now either.  I'm a pretty happy camper.

Marauders #10 (May 27):  We've been building to what Duggan hints is coming next issue, namely the Five coming to the conclusion that they can't resurrect Kate.   Charles tells them that he'll inform the White Queen, and I'm sure that conversation will go well. 

Meanwhile, the Marauders are wrapping up loose ends related to the first few issues, making it seem like we'll go in a new direction after Kate's funeral.  In this issue, they seize not only the Russian ship carrying Forge's anti-mutant technology but also Forge's former employee whose photographic memory helped the Russians create it.  We learn the Mercury is a UFO that Emma has somehow acquired, though Christian and Emma refuse to reveal how, telling people who ask only that it's a story.  (Of course it is.)

Again, if the plan is to keep Kate dead for a while, I wonder where we go from here.  I feel like this title is really the most X-Men title of the current line, given not only the sheer number of X-Men that appear in it but also the team's mandate to rescue mutants in trouble.  I wonder if that mission changes with Kate's (alleged) death.

Also Read:  Marauders #9 (March 4); X-Men/Fantastic Four #2 (March 4) and #3 (March 25); Amazing Spider-Man #41 (March 11); Falcon & Winter Soldier #2 (March 25); Giant-Size X-Men:  Nightcrawler (March 25); X-Men #9 (March 25)

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