Saturday, April 15, 2023

Five-Month-Old Comics: The November 2 Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Astronaut Down #4:  This issue is best enjoyed if you accept the metaphysical explanations at face value.

Newly arrived in another reality (again), Douglas hears from this reality's scientists that they just sent out their own astronauts when Douglas appeared.  Due to what the scientists call "shift theory," Douglas shifted to this reality almost immediately after its Douglas departed his body, since "neighboring realities have only slight variations and would be in the same crises and attempting the same mission."  This part I accept (more or less).

However, I raised an eyebrow at the next part, where the scientists explain that, by imbedding their reality's cure equation in every astronaut's consciousness pack, they ensure the neighboring realities would do the same.  First, I'm now sure about the causal directionality there.  It implies that events aren't happening independently in each reality.  In other words, the cancer might have occurred in Set B of realities only because it occurred sui generis in Set A of neighboring realities.  Second, if they had the cure, why did they need Douglas?  Did their cure not work in their reality?  At any rate, as I said, it's easier to accept it at face value:  Douglas arrives in this reality with the cure, which we know he found in his previous reality.  

The rest of the issue focuses on Douglas' guilt over saving this reality but not his own one.  Complicating matters, this reality's Maddie proposes they get together.  Douglas doesn't initially respond, but he later activates a message from Dr. Engle in which she confirms that they knew his mission may only save another reality.  She encourages him to live his life wherever he is, and he and Maddie get together.

Of course, just as Maddie tells Douglas she wants a baby, this new reality's scientists inform Douglas that they think they can send back his consciousness to his reality if they can retrieve some equipment from a warehouse in an area where the cancer's control is fading.  Of course, Douglas would die in said mission.  Poor Douglas.

Batman #129:  The irony of this issue is that the fight between Batman and Failsafe is almost boring.  

Just before Failsafe arrives in Atlantis and captures Aquaman, Bruce escapes to the Moon-based Watchtower.  He's surprised Failsafe makes it there as quickly as he does but manages to do some damage to him thanks to a gun that involves "three quadrillion watts and New Genesis steel."  

Batman then pulls a "Superman 2:"  figuring Failsafe destroyed all the Justice League's teleporters except one - which would inevitably lead him to a similar "Home Alone"-esque gauntlet the Justice League encountered in Gotham - Batman reversed the, I don't know, polarities.  As such, he sends Failsafe to the Hall of Justice, where he was planning on running Batman through said gauntlet.  But for some reason doing so caused the Watchtower to explode, leaving Batman floating in space with few options.  

Again, it's action-packed, but we're watching Bruce match wits essentially against himself, which makes it feel clinical.  We really need to amp up the emotional stakes with the Bat-family's lives on the line to make this arc as legendary as I think it's going to be.

Blade Runner:  Black Lotus #4:  This issue is a disappointing end to a disappointing series.  

First, Collins throws us an unnecessary curveball when it turns out one of the "hostages," Preston, was the one who initially betrayed the co-op.  He collided with Barnes to set up the assassination attempt on Miguel and the kidnapping of the hostages.  Why, you ask?  Because he loved Nyoko!  Men are such dummies.

After Elle defeats Preston, Kozlov sets up Miguel when he demands that he meet him alone at Junktown for "negotiations."  Despite Junkett warning Miguel that Kozlov was in town stirring up the townspeople against the co-op, Miguel insists on going - alone - because...I don't know, peace.  If he's really such an idiot, I'm surprised he survived his time as a Blade Runner.  

Elle rushes ahead of Miguel to fight Kozlov, forcing him to confess Barnes' scheme to the townspeople.  But she's such a fucking idiot that she goes full Replicant on a guy who barely has a face at this point, raising the townspeople's suspicions.  She decides that she has to leave to keep the co-op safe, which in and of itself doesn't make sense.  Making matters worse, she decides not to say good-bye, even with a wailing Kaja begging her not to leave.  She literally just gets on her spinner bike and tells the co-op folks to have a good life.

Elle deserved better than this series.

Star Wars #29:  I wanted to like this issue.  After all, it does what I've been asking Soule to do, to refocus on the main characters after his recent attempts at telling stories involving marginal characters haven't worked so well.  

Here, Amilyn Holdo bringing Chewbacca, Lando, Leia, and Luke on a wild goose chase to find the legendary lost Kezarat convoy and its hundred tankers full of tibanna coaxium.  We even get some surprisingly great banter between Amilyn and Lando.

But something about the issue's flow is clunky.  Maybe it's because Amilyn keeps going to ridiculous lengths to keep the plan from Leia, all under the guise that they're just on a vacation.  Maybe it's because Soule is forced to jam Amilyn's eventual explanation into too few panels after spending so much time setting up the denouement.  Whatever it is, meh.

X-Men Red #8:  Ewing exhibits a masterful control over the pace and tone of this story as he weaves together several seemingly unconnected events into drama.

Cable recruits a team to find a sample of his techno-organic virus that a race called the Progenitors stole from him.  (I would've appreciated an editor's note here to give me a little more information about when that happened.)  He explains that it involves eventually taking out Abigail Brand, though going about it the long way.

Using their combined resources, the team finds the virus on a planet in the gap between galaxies and stumbles upon the entities who buried Vulcan's dark side in "X-Men (2019)" #10.  Intrigued by the entitites' creepiness when the team finds them in some form of stasis, Cable (somehow) activates their memories.  The team (conveniently) sees their memories regarding tinkering with Vulcan.  Before Cable can warn anyone, Orbis Stellaris attacks, as he's apparently the progenitor of the Progenitors.

Meanwhile, the Kree-Skrull Alliance has called a diplomatic meeting in the Diplomatic Zone of Lake Hellas on Arakko to inform the Galactic Council that "new information" has come to light showing the Shi'ar were behind a massacre at a place called Shapeless Ridge.  (The Kree actually committed said killings during a lull in the Kree-Skrull War.)  Xandra arrives and confirms the information, as it was one of the Ten Shames the Kin Crimson was trying to hide.  Before Xandra and Paibok can agree to compensation, an unhinged Vulcan arrives at Lake Hellas to declare himself King of the Shi'ar.  The issue ends showing a gleeful Abigail Brand exulting in her plan coming to fruition.

In the back matter, we learn about said plan. Brand worked with Orbis Stellaris because he could retrieve Vulcan from the Fault and make him docile until Brand needed him not to be.  In exchange, Orbis Stellaris got "credits up front and favors down the line."  Brand also leaked the information about Shapeless Ridge to the Alliance.  By unleashing Vulcan at that moment, she ensured (to her mind) a Shi'ar civil war between Vulcan and Xandra while they're also fighting off the Alliance.

Honestly, I'm shocked by how much Brand's plan makes sense.  In order to strengthen the Sol system, she's unleashing war among (and within) our rivals.  Moreover, she's positioning Sol as the peacemaker.  The only problem with her plan that I can see is her hope that the X-Men will force the Arakkii to return to Amenth and S.W.O.R.D. will take over Arakko as a "diplomatic world."  But given how successful she's been so far, I don't put it past her to make that happen.

Also, as a Nova fan, let me just say that I love how the Arakkii acknowledge him as one of them given his heroics in the face of Uranos.  It's the respect he so deserves and rarely gets.

Also Read:  Star Wars:  Bounty Hunters #28

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