Monday, March 25, 2024

Eleven-Month-Old Comics!: The March 29 Top-Shelf Edition (HERE BE SPOILER!)

Dragon Age:  The Missing #3:  Mann moves way too quickly here, as he's done in other issues, though the pace renders this one almost incomprehensible.  

Varric and Harding yet again meet a group that can conveniently help them with their specific task, this time moving through the weirded Arlathan Forest to get to the Crucious Stone before the Venatori do.  Like the two previous issues, this issue could be a mini-series in and of itself, given the trials and tribulations the temporary team faces in its journey.  

Arriving at the temple they sought, Varric discovers a note from Solas, affirming that he's going to do what he intends but pledging to limit the damage.  One of Varric's teammates observes that the Dread Wolf's possession of the Crucious Stone likely caused the weirding of the forest, making it clear that Solas' definition of "limiting the damage" might not be the same as everyone else's.  

I wish Mann had more time to explore this story, because it's a good one, but it's clear management is forcing him to hit his marks more quickly than advisable.

Dungeons & Dragons:  Saturday Morning Adventures #1:  I'll admit that I had a really high level of excitement for this issue.  It doesn't quite clear that bar, given that it's 19 pages long and reads like it's half that number.  Booher and Maggs throw in enough interesting developments to keep me going, though, such as the revelation that the kids are in the Realms and Dungeon Master's nod to Otik's spiced potatoes.  Would I mind seeing them in Krynn after Waterdeep?  No, I would not.  But I also wouldn't mind Booher and Maggs trying to tell a more serious story than the one they tell here.

Local Man #2:  Fleecs and Seeley do a great job moving us confidently and quickly through this issue to get us going on the larger story they're telling.

The cops arrest Jack on suspicion of murdering Hodag, and Jack reveals to the chief that Inga (i.e., the chief's wife) is his alibi.  After the chief releases him, Jack quips (like an asshole) that it's interesting Inga didn't mention they met, and he gets his just desserts when the chief quips that Inga never mentions him at all.  (I can see what Inga sees in him.)

Jack gets in trouble when the Third Gen drone trailing him suspects he's getting involved in the investigation, so he takes Pepper for a walk to visit Hodag's mother.  She's a lovely and sharp woman.  She utters a code that temporarily disables the drone, telling Jack that Hodag had one for years and she learned to invoke her right to "non-target privacy."  As such, they have a private conversation inside her trailer.

She recalls how Hodag chose Crossjack as his enemy because Crossjack understood that it was all a show.  She reveals that the Camo Crusader bashed in Hodag's brains, rendering him seriously brain damaged, and thanks Jack for "fucking that fascist prick's wife, hard and long for years."  (Aha!)  She rues on how they could send a billion-dollar robot to monitor Hodag but couldn't use the money to fix his implants or his pain.

Before Jack leaves, she gives him the drawings that Hodag used to do in crayon.  Going through them later that night, Jack sees the word "Aphek," which reminds him of the Aphek Engine, a previous mission's subject.  Dressed in a mask and wielding a bow and arrow, he takes out the drone and promises its remains that he'll mind his own business.

Star Wars:  Return of the Jedi - Jabba's Palace #1:  At this point, you'd figure we've heard the story of every droid, gangster, and scoundrel in Jabba's palace in "Star Wars:  Return of the Jedi."  Guggenheim shows us not only were we wrong but how wonderfully wrong we were.  

We're treated to the story of Eightyem, Threepio's predecessor as Jabba's protocol droid, who we last saw hanging on the wall in Jabba's droid torture chamber.  It turns out poor Eightyem was dragged into a conspiracy that a fast talking Twi'lek named Silvan Kaan put together to take out Jabba.  It ends the way you'd expect (and, frankly, Eightyem should've expected), with an equally fast talking bounty hunter named Bane Malar (hi, Toril!) spoiling their plans as a way to curry Jabba's favor.  Kaan ends in the sarlaac pit, and Eightyem finds himself on the aforementioned wall.

Honestly, this story was so great that I'd love to see where Guggenheim could take Bane Malar.

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