Wednesday, May 6, 2020

Not-Even-Remotely-New Comics: The November 20 Non-Marvel Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Batman:  White Knight Presents Von Freeze #1:  It's hard to critique a comic that the author says resulted in him crying hysterically over his estranged relationship with his parents at brunch with an artist who he idolized.  In other words, I'll try to be gentle.

This issue isn't terrible by any stretch of the imagination, but it confuses me.  First, we learn that it fits between "Batman:  Curse of the White Knight" issues #6 and #7, even though DC hadn't yet published issue #5 at this point.  I'm left to assume that Dr. Fries will become more relevant and, presumably, tragic by issue #8.  I only vaguely remember him from the first series, making this issue feel all the more unmoored from the main story that Murphy is telling.

But, even if I read it in the proper sequence, I'm not sure that it would improve my understanding of why it exists.  Virtually the entire issue is exposition, as Fries describes his family's past to Thomas Wayne.  It doesn't help that the reason they're in this situation is ridiculous.  Martha is pregnant with Bruce, and Thomas brought her to see Fries' lab, which he's funding.  Martha has a complication with the pregnancy, forcing Fries to use his cryogenic equipment to freeze her until such a point when they can address the problem.  Fries is telling Wayne his story to keep his mind off Martha and the baby.  Sure, OK.  A good Holocaust story always cheers up a man worried his wife and child are going to die.

It's also hard to tell what Murphy wants us to feel about Victor's father, Baron von Fries. He joins the SS as a way to continue his research, even though he's hiding his Jewish partner and his partner's extended family in their joint lab.  At several points throughout the story it seems clear that the Baron doesn't have his partner's best interests at heart, but Victor's recollections often portray him as always trying to do right by his partner.  I get that it might just be a son's skewed memories, but Murphy doesn't do anything to convey that.  I'm just connecting the dots that Murphy himself left unconnected.

Honestly, given the struggle that I'm already having with the main series, I feel like Murphy might have been better served spending more time tightening up that story rather than taking us on this journey that we didn't really ask to take.

The Weatherman, Vol. 2 #5:  Christ on the cross, Kathleen.  This issue is insane, and I mean that in the best possible way.  It's actually very straightforward for how significant it is.  But it's one of the wildest rides that I've ever taken in a comic.

It turns out Nathan didn't become a biophagus construct.  At the last minute, he decided not to sacrifice himself to the biophagus mob.  Instead, he stole the soldiers' ship at Syngen Station and flew to Dr. Argus' lab to pick up his lab assistant, Regi.  (Before they left, they apparently had milk and cookies, which excited Nathan greatly).  Regi then assumed Nathan's form upon arriving at Skyborough and starts taking down Skyborough's soldiers.

In the present, Kestrel's assistant/lover Vager wants to evacuate her, but she refuses.  She tells him to exterminate the construct (i.e., Regi) since they've only survived this long through keeping the biophagus on the surface; if it comes to Skyborough, they're all dead.  Speaking of the surface, the rest of the team gets loaded onto the next transport to feed the biophagus before Nathan can board.  Nathan wonders what Cross would do when he notices their ship in Skyborough's hanger.

On Mars, the president had a director stage the terrorist attack, using already dead bodies (presumably of people they didn't kill explicitly for the attack...) instead of living people.  They've captured Jenner's agent, Djinn, and she confirms that Jenner has a psychic, explaining why Jenner has successfully rooted out Arcadia's attempts to infiltrate his operation.  Unfortunately, Djinn has resisted their probes; they just learned that Jenner is somewhere on Venus.  The President is discouraged and tells Councilman Cyrus that they can resume thermal drops but she first asks a favor as she looks at Cross' image.

On Earth, the team lands and starts to run from the biophagus, but it looks grim.  However, Nathan hits a bunch of buttons on the ship and it turns out the ship is a Transformer.  He's now basically Voltron and saves the day!  Woot!  White Light takes the controls as Nathan explains to Cross how he got there, as described above.  (Earlier, he commented to himself as he struggled to fly the ship that it's much harder than it looks and he now understands why White Light acts like she's surrounded by idiots.)  White Light destroys a few large constructs only for the kid from last issue to unleash his bomb aboard one of the transport ships, sending it straight at Voltron.  

On Skyborough, Kestrel realizes that the biophagus will attack the station given the kid's action have destroyed half its food.  She tells Vager to evacuate the city because it's over and they share a kiss.  The biophagus forms essentially an enormous Mothra and starts tearing through Skyborough.  White Light docks with a burning Skyborough, and Cross attempts to depart the ship to retrieve Ian Black's memory drive.  Oddly, Nathan is the voice of reason, convincing her that it's hopeless.  He promises her that they'll find Jenner another way.  Tellingly, Cross listens to him, a sign that Nathan is becoming less of a jester as the story advances.

On Skyborough, Kestrel straps on a bunch of guns to fight the biophagus, telling it that she's been waiting for this moment her whole life.  She then sees Mero in the construct, and she's frozen in grief as the construct crashes over her.  Dr. Argus emerges from the crowds fleeing to the escape transports, and Cross pulls him onto their ship.  Argus offers his hand to Regi, telling him that he could save humanity.  Regi simply comments, "'I know this hurts'" (echoing Dr. Argus from issue #2), and Regi explodes with Skyborough as Argus screams in fury.  The ship then closes its doors and departs.  

Whoa.  I assume that we're going to Venus in volume 3 to get Jenner, since Cross no longer needs Black's memory drive to find him.  But, man, I'm going to need a few months before I can handle that story.  I'm just afraid what LeHeup is going to do to us next issue!

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