Not-Even-Remotely-New Comics: The October 9 Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Amazing Spider-Man #31:  So...much...talking.  This issue is just like last one, with Kindred rambling on endlessly at Norman's cell about how much he hates Norman and Peter.  Spencer uses said diatribe to review Norman and Peter's relationship, with Kindred wondering why Norman was so obsessed with Peter.  He congratulates Norman for bringing down Peter in ways that no one else has accomplished but then threatens to destroy Norman once he remembers who he is.  In other words, Spencer is obviously setting the stage for a three-way confrontation at the end of the Kindred story.  But, it's starting to feel like Spencer is dragging out this story way too much.  I hope he isn't vamping to get to issue #50 or something.  Also, this issue doesn't help, as it's a confusing jumble of moments.  Spencer uses two flashback sequences -- Kindred speaking to Norman before he becomes Carnage and a variety of scenes depicting Harry's struggles with drugs -- while also juggling the present-day sequence of Carnage trying to get at Dylan and Normie.  It's difficult to follow, to say the least.  In the end, the only significant development in this two-issue arc is that Kindred injects one of his bugs into Norman's brain, which will eventually cure him of his delusion that he's Cletus Kasady.  Although Spencer uses the tie-in requirement as an opportunity to further the story that he's already telling in this title, I could've definitely done without it.  I'm excited to move onto 2099 next issue.

The Batman's Grave #1:  I love Ellis and Hitch, so I'm excited about this series.  That said, it isn't the strongest debut as I'm not entirely sure where we're going here.  Batman doesn't really do anything more complicated than solve a murder in this issue.  Moreover, the murder itself isn't particularly complicated.  The only item of note in this entire issue is Bruce creating a holographic copy of the crime scene that allows him to examine clues from the Batcave.  It's cool, but introducing new gadgets clearly isn't the point of this series.  The title refers to the fact the Waynes had Bruce's grave (including headstone) created at the same time as they had their graves created.  The issue opens with Alfred tending to the graves, knowing that he will live to see Bruce's filled.  Bruce returns home to find Alfred drinking, and Alfred confesses that he sometimes thinks that it would be easier for Bruce to buy Gotham than simply to beat on poor people driven to crime to survive.  Bruce is unsympathetic to this argument; he comments that they had choices, though he doesn't seem to grasp that, you know, maybe they didn't.  Teaching Bruce a lesson to make him examine his lack of compassion seems to be where Ellis is going here, but I guess we'll see.

Detective Comics #1,013:  Tomasi is telling a great story here.  First, he shows Freeze as a serious match for Batman.  After shaking down Freeze's goons to find out his location, Batman arrives in a fancy new suit of armor that includes a fire-spewing gun.  But, Freeze is ready for him.  He awakens his previous experiments as frozen zombies who quickly overwhelm Bruce, allowing Freeze to escape with Nora.  When Bruce battles his way through the zombie horde and makes his way onto Freeze's fancy vehicle, Freeze electrocutes him, sending him spiraling into the frozen lake.  Going one better, he launches a depth charge that freezes Bruce in the lake, allowing Freeze (and Nora) to escape.  You don't often see Bruce so outmatched by someone else's gadgets, which makes this issue all the more exciting.  In the end, Bruce is able to rescue the women who Freeze kidnapped, but Freeze has what he needs:  he resurrects Nora.  That said, the last page is chilling (heh) as she awakens, screaming, "No, Victor, don't!"

Powers of X #6:  This issue is fine, though it feels like Hickman is vamping a little.  He repeats the full seven pages of Moira meeting Charles from issue #1 and two full pages of the celebration from House of X #6.  In a 38-page issue, it means that we've already seen almost 25 percent of this issue.

The reason Hickman does so is that Moira has allegedly learned her final lesson in X3.  As the Man-Machine Supremacy prepares to ascend and become part of the Phalanx, the Librarian visits the Preserve.  We learn that Logan and Moira have been living in the Preserve with other mutants for millennia, waiting to find out what the Supremacy was planning.  Hickman is particularly Hickmanesque here, as I don't really understand how he connects the following dots.  As best as I can tell, the Librarian is sending Logan and Moira off-world so that they don't die, because if they die before the Phalanx makes it to the nearest black hole with the uploaded Supremacy, according to the Librarian, "then all that I know will not become part of the Dominion."  I think he means that, if Moira dies, she will reincarnate and try to stop this timeline from happening.  As such, the Librarian wouldn't achieve his goal of merging with the Dominion.  If he doesn't mean that, I have no idea what he means.

However, Logan asks why the Librarian is giving them this information, and it sounds like the answer is that he's worried that life as part of the Phalanx will be a fake existence.  As such, he wants Moira to tell him how he could avoid losing his post-humanity in surrendering to the machines.  Again, I'm not sure what the Librarian means here.  Does he want Moira to return in a different life and, at that moment, inform him if he's making the right decision?  As part of this discussion, he allegedly reveals the final clue:  mutantkind always loses, because humanity always ascends to post-humanity through genetic engineering.  As the Librarian says, what good is one mutant if humanity can build supermen?  The Librarian calls post-humans Homo novissima, and I admit that I love that name.  Magneto was always touting mutantkind as homo superior.  I never saw coming that a different form of humanity would trump that.

We learn through Moira's journals that the change she makes in her relationship with Charles in her current (tenth) life is that she breaks him of his belief in the people's goodness.  I think this revelation finally forces a reckoning over whether Moira is creating new timelines (i.e., the multiverse theory, which DC tends to favor) or replacing the existing one with each new life.  After all, if she isn't changing the timeline, Charles in this timeline did believe in people's goodness.  Are we supposed to believe that Charles pretended to believe, to fool the X-Men into following him?  If so, why bother?  Why not just agree with Magneto that humans are untrustworthy assholes?  Do they all have specific information that it has to unfold this way, with Charles and Magneto in some form of opposition?  If we're to believe that everything that we've seen happen in X-Men comics over the years has happened (i.e., Moira isn't changing the timeline and all of X-Men history has been part of Charles, Erik, and Moira's "long game"), then it's the only possible explanation.

In other words, Hickman has to explain at some point the fits and starts that led Charles, Erik, and Moira to this point.  We need to know if Charles and Erik fighting over the years was simply them playing the parts that Moira needed them to play to get to this moment.  Or, were they fighting as a result of legitimate disagreements about how best to achieve victory on their way to this point?  Did Charles really fake his belief in humanity because he felt that it was the best way to develop a group of mutants like the X-Men?  Or, were they simply moving pieces across the board?  In her journals, Moira provides a clue, noting that she implanted the idea of an island Utopia in Erik's mind through her experiences.  As such, did Erik create Asteroid M and Genosha thinking that he had achieved Moira's vision, with or without her or Charles?  In other words, Hickman has so far done a good job of avoiding the implications of Moira functionally time traveling, but I feel like this issue is where that becomes increasingly difficult to ignore.

At any rate, Charles and Magneto meet with Moira the night before the first Quiet Council meeting and she's troubled to learn that they convinced Mystique to join the Council on the promise of resurrecting Destiny.  Moira insists that they can't do so because Destiny has ways of seeing Moira (as we've seen).  She's afraid that her resurrection means that she'll see the truth:  that they always lose.  She worries that Destiny will then tell everyone, and Charles and Erik say that they'll delay the moment, but also that one day mutantkind deserves to know the truth.  To them, it's that they always used to lose, but this time is different, something that Moira clearly doesn't believe.  They then exit into the celebrations of "House of X" #6.

I guess that I get why Moira would be concerned if mutantkind knew that they always lose.  But, if we're talking about millennia as the time scale, is it really that upsetting?  Like, sure, if Orchis Forge brought Nimrod online next year (in the case where the X-Men didn't act on Moira's knowledge), I could see Moira's concern.  But, if we're talking about mutantkind ceasing to exist because machines run Earth at some point 1,000 years from now in X3, is that so bad?  Like, the Universe is eventually going to die, but I can still find a reason to wake up every morning.  I'm pretty sure that Hickman has more up his sleeve here.  That said, I'm hoping the new titles take a step back a bit and focus on the characters.  We have so much possibility for good ol' X-Men drama given how many people we've resurrected here, I'd love to just marinate in that for a while.  I also want to make it clear that the disappointment that I felt in this issue didn't in anyway dim how I feel about this reboot. I am so excited to see where we go, and I just really tip my cap to the amazing accomplishment that Hickman has delivered here.  Thank you, Jonathan!  Onwards and upwards!

Also Read:  Invaders #10; Journey to Star Wars:  The Rise of Skywalker - Allegiance #1; Star Wars:  Target Vader #4

Not-Even-Remotely-New Comics: The September 25 Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Amazing Spider-Man #30:  One consequence of finding myself a year behind in comics is that I'm not as zealous in jumping into events as I once was.  When I saw "Amazing Spider-Man" only had two tie-in issues for "Absolute Carnage," I took a pass on getting the main series.  This issue didn't really make me regret that decision.

Cletus Kassady is once again back trying to kill all the previous symbiote hosts, allegedly to take the "codex" left inside each host to resurrect his god, Knull.  Sure, whatever.  Also, Norman Osborn for some reason thinks that he's Cletus and he's trying to get to Normie and Eddie Brock's son, Dylan.  Only Spider-Man stands in his way.

At various points in the issue, we're treated to a weird flashback sequence of Peter throwing a welcome-home-from-the-asylum party for Harry where he has tension with a just-returned-from-the-war Flash.  I don't quite get where Spencer was going with that.  I think that it has something to do with the issues's framing device, itself a flashback, where Kindred is speaking to a catatonic Norman while he's still imprisoned in Ravencroft.  I'm guessing that this conversation happens right after Kindred allegedly killed Mysterio and presumably before Norman became Red Goblin again.  Kindred tells Norman that he already won when it came to ruining Pete's innocence and that Norman used to make him feel powerless, again implying that he's Harry Osborn.

Spencer's trying to do what he can here to keep us connected to the story that he was telling before he was event-ed, so I'm happy to just roll with these two issues and return to what we were doing after that.  But, I'll also say that I really, really hope that his plan isn't to drag out the Kindred storyline until issue #50, because I increasingly find myself not caring all that much. 

Batman:  Curse of the White Knight #3:  I have to say that I'm not really digging this series.  Visually, it's as stunning as the first one, but the plot is starting to feel thin.  Each issue of the first series produced a major revelation that took on Batman's sacred cows.  Here, we're three issues into this series and we already have a "shocking death," the sort of clichéd development that's usually the sign of a desperate author without any other ideas.  Moreover, the Joker's promise that he'll reveal his great secret in due course feels like a stalling tactic, like Murphy himself doesn't know how the story ends.

It isn't just the overall plot that has problems.  We have some specific moments here that make little sense.  For example, I don't understand why Barbara and Dick had to pull in the GTO to rescue Bruce from the bay after Azrael blew up Wayne Manor, thereby revealing his secret identity to the rest of the GTO.  Dick claims that they had no choice, because they needed to use a helicopter to rescue him.  But,I don't get why they did.  Barbara and Dick manage to pull him from the water in a small police boat; they couldn't have gotten to shore in that?  

At any rate, other than Bullock's snarky comments, everyone pays close attention as Bruce tells them about the Joker and Azrael back at GTO HQ.  He explains that Ruth and the elites are trying to replace Bruce with Azrael to keep the Batman Devastation Fund going.  He also explains Azrael's connection to the Order of St. Dumas.  Bruce notes that Edmund Wayne was supposed to share half the land with Bakkar (the man who rescued him in London), and they all guess that the Joker has, at the very least, convinced Azrael that he's Bakkar's descendant.  

Batman then visits Harley, revealing his identity to her to build her trust as he asks her to try to draw out Napier.  They arrive to interrogate the Joker, who thinks, as usual, that he's holding all the cards.  But, Batman reveals that he knows that the Joker stole Laffy Arkham's schtick, infuriating the Joker.  The Joker settles down a bit and explains that Laffy told the Joker in their first "meeting" the greatest joke in all of Gotham, about the Wayne family, and that he's saving it for his "grand finale" when he shares it with the entire city.  (I get why Murphy is stalling, but I don't get why the Joker is.  Is it to torture Bruce with slow reveals?  It mostly seems like it's just to give Bruce time to stop him.)  Batman's attempt to use a pregnant Harley to draw out Napier fails, though we learn that she's carrying twins.  The Joker says that he's got to kill Napier's (viewing the other child as his), something that Bruce probably should've seen coming before involving her.

The city evacuates Arkham now that they realize the elites control it, and Batman takes Harley to the Joker's original cell.  He's surprised to learn that the Joker didn't tell her his identity (he assumed that she knew, part of the reason he revealed it to her in the first place) just like he's also surprised that he never mentioned Laffy or the Joker's grand finale.  (Is Harley lying and she's pulling the strings here?)  In the cell, Harley wonders if Edmund killed Bakkar, and Batman is startled when they discover another skeleton buried beneath the floor.  Harley then melodramatically goes into labor.

Meanwhile, at a bar, Gordon announces to his colleagues that he's resigning and suggested Montoya take over the department.  She's worried that it's tokenism, but they all voice an emotional round of support for her.  Gordon leaves and encounters Batman in the alley.  He apologizes for losing her temper, telling him that he knows full well that Barbara is going to do whatever she wants to do and that he probably tried to convince her not to do it.  Gordon offers his hand asking for no more secrets, and it turns out it's Azrael.  He absconds with Gordon and the rest of the GCPD come running after Gordon fires off a few shots.  He tells them to tell Barbra that he loves her and that he couldn't be more proud as Azrael's associates open fire on them.  Bullock is hit as Azrael stabs Jim with his sword and throws his body off a rooftop.

I guess I'm still interested to see where we go here.  Gordon's conversation with "Batman" was the sort of insightful moment that I expected of this series, and if Murphy can reorient to focus more on those sorts of moments I think this ship can still be righted.

New Mutants:  War Children #1:  I love me some "New Mutants," and I was obviously excited to see Claremont and Sienkiewicz return.  I can't say I was disappointed exactly; I was mostly just confused.  The exact nature of the transmode virus has changed over the years to suit individual authors' purposes, and this issue is no different.  Warlock apparently decides to absorb all the New Mutants so that he doesn't have to kill them in his battle with Magus, a plot development I don't really totally understand.  I think Claremont is arguing that Warlock is worried that, if Warlock defeats Magus, he'll become Magus and will therefore kill the New Mutants because they're human, but I'm not entirely sure.  I also didn't follow Darkchilde somehow taking over Warlock and creating a demonic iteration of the virus (to the extent that I understand what happened there).  In the end Doug willingly merges with Warlock and they use their combined powers to absorb the transmode virus from the other New Mutants, something I don't remember anyone ever doing before.  Whatever.  At least the art was pretty.

Powers of X #5:  Hickman very quickly moves us through the mechanics of the nation that Charles and Magneto have created.

First, in X0, he convinces a willing Forge to create Cerebro 7.0, using a "cloaked antimatter engine of [Shi'ar] design currently in Earth's orbit" to power it and Shi'ar logic diamonds to house five copies of every mutant mind.  We learn that Charles creates latest-version copies of every mind once a week and a hard-backup version every year.  The latter one is a fresh copy of a whole mind, and it takes him three days, during which time he cannot be disturbed (opening up a future storyline, no doubt).  Moreover, we learn that Charles has twice booted his mind to a previous version (something essentially only he has the talent to do) and that only specially adapted mutants could overcome their mind being placed in a different husk.  I think this revelation was the last piece of the puzzle of how Charles put together his resurrection protocols, another example of how carefully Hickman has created this story.

In X1, we see Charles and Xavier offering Emma and her Hellfire Corporation a fifty-year exclusive contract to distribute the Krakoa products.  (As she says, she's going to be Krakoa's East India trading company.)  They also offer her two seats on the Quiet Council, the 12-person Council that governs Krakoa.  Why two?  They also want her to bring in Sebastian Shaw.  Whereas Emma will serve as the White Queen, representing Krakoa to the nations that recognize it, Shaw will serve as the Black King, smuggling the drugs into, and evacuating the mutants from, the countries that reject Krakoa's sovereignty.

Finally, Hickman returns to the X3 timeline, where the Phalanx have accepted Earth's offer to join them.  But, to do so, they need energy.  As such, the next day, the Phalanx will absorb Earth's' collective intelligence.  It'll maintaining this intelligence forever, but the cost will be the consumption of the entire planet.

Nimrod explains that Earth-bound machines and the Phalanx are both self-improving and self-replicating intelligences.  However, the Phalanx go beyond just simply generational advancement.  Their creators were constructed using the fundamental components of the Universe.  They are the super-massive machine brains that the Titan theory holds became so dense that they collapse space-time, turning themselves into the singularities at the center of each black hole.  However, Hickman's story goes beyond just explaining what black holes are.  As the interstitial page explains, five connected Titans form Strongholds warring with other Strongholds whereas Dominions are ten or more Titans controlling a sector of space and epochs of time:  they're "one giant societal intelligence" that resembles our concept of God.  Apparently 112 Titans form the Dominion that controls our sector, and they're only afraid of Galactus and the Phoenix.

I don't have much else to say here as Hickman does a solid job of delivering all these plot developments without sounding too exposition-y.  I still don't entirely understand the relevance of X3 to the other three timelines, but I'm sure that Hickman has a plan.

Also Read:  Captain America #14; Detective Comics #1,012; Star Wars:  Age of Resistance - Kylo Ren #1; Star Wars:  Target Vader #3