Two-Month-Old Comics: The Superhero March 9 and 16 (2022) Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Amazing Spider-Man #92 (March 9):  Thompson does a better job in this issue of keeping the humor to a reasonable level while focusing on Ben's increasingly disturbing descent into madness.

As Ben tears his way through Beyond HQ to get to Maxine, he contemplates the fact that he doesn't know what his values are without Peter's memories.  He keeps telling himself that he isn't a bad person and is clearly worried that he's going to cross a line as he's taking out guard after guard.  (He has to destroy his A.I. assistant Langston to break into the building and notes that the Peter part of him would've felt bad about that but that part of him is gone.)  But, Janine's memories are all his own; when she arrives, it helps ground him.  He then goes after Maxine while Janine goes to save Marcus.

Meanwhile, we learn that Lizard Z is actually Vampire Lizard Z after Colleen, Misty, and Spidey stumble upon a comatose Morbius.  I'm a little confused why Peter keeps calling Lizard Z "Dr. Connors," since I thought that they were still separated?  At any rate, Colleen and Misty free "Mike," which sets up "Beyond's" end-game:  Colleen, "Mike," and Misty will take care of Lizard Z in "Amazing Spider-Man" #92.BEY while Peter heads to help Ben in "Amazing Spider-Man" #93.

I actually find myself wishing that the "Beyond" arc could've lasted longer, which is the best compliment I can imagine.

Devil's Reign #5 (March 9):  This issue is a little chaotic, as Zdarsky references events or situations that I don't recall happening.  For example, the intro page says that Otto has control of the city, which seems a little more extreme than I remember from last issue.  I'm assuming one of the tie-in issues made that development more clear, so I'm just going with it.

At any rate, Jessica Jones and the Champions try to free the Purple Children from U.S.Agent and the Thunderbolts, but they only manage to free one Child before the Abomination forces them to flee.  Meanwhile, Butch plans on taking out Kingpin since revenues are down 80 percent while Mike Murdoch hopes to use his hidden Norn Stone to somehow fix the situation.

Elsewhere, Otto transfers the rest of the Purple Children's powers to Purple Man, but, Otto being Otto, is confident that he's safe from Kingpin due to his neural blockers.  As Kingpin says, Otto's short-term thinking is why Spider-Man always defeats him, and Kingpin takes control of Otto-Hulk to take out Otto.  Kingpin then orders Purple Man to kill all the heroes, which he plans on doing through his control of New York City's citizens.  Later, Fisk arrives at Mike Murdoch's place and, thinking that he's Matt, beats him to death.

In other words, it isn't going great for our folks.  That said, Wilson is so clearly over the edge that he's going to make some sort of mistake.

Devil's Reign:  Moon Knight #1 (March 9):  Fuck, man, this issue is intense.

It turns out Moon Knight let himself get captured and sent to the Myrmidon so that he could take out Man Mountain Marko, who threatened to kill his ex-wife (who came to Marc for help) and take their super-powered daughter.  Marc certainly isn't going to let that happen, so he moves his way up the fighting-pit circuit the guards have going to take on Marko, the reigning champion.  When Marko refuses to leave his ex-wife and daughter alone, Marc pokes out his eyes.  Oh, Marc:  such a softie.  

When Marc's cellmate, 8-Ball, asks whether the heroes will take him (Marc) with them when they inevitably escape, he says that they will since they need someone like him to take on Fisk.  I like McKay ending with this point.  As much as the Avengers view him as a problem that they'd love someone to solve, I'm pretty sure that they won't mind him taking on U.S.Agent and the Thunderbolts.

Hawkeye:  Kate Bishop #5 (March 9):  Eh.  This mini-series was fine, I guess.  Nijkamp wraps up all the loose ends (except for an escaped Pascal, about whom I care not at all) and maneuvers Kate home to New York.  I'm honestly not sure why Marvel gave us such a convoluted mini-series just to get her to New York since she could've just, you know, moved there.  I'm also still not really sure how Susan got her hands on a Cosmic Cube fragment.  But, Lucky the Pizza Dog getting a hold of said fragment and generating piles of pizza and stuffed toys was worth the price of admission, I guess.  It's as strong of a recommendation as I can make, so there you go.

X Deaths of Wolverine #4 (March 9):  Ugh.  This issue isn't terrible, but I still don't know why we're belaboring this story.  

Omega Logan and the Wolverine track down Arnab Chakladar, and Omega Logan informs Chakladar that whatever he's creating with Moira is what enables the machines in the future to destroy humanity and mutantkind.  Omega Logan promises not to kill Chakladar if he tells him where Moira went.  When Chakladar tells him that she went to Krakoa (using Banshee's skin - oof - to trick the gate), Logan lobotomizes him and orders the Wolverines to destroy the lab.  On Krakoa, Moira (allegedly) strips Forge of his powers with his gun before Logan (allegedly) kills her and succumbs to the Phalanx.

As I said, it isn't terrible, but I'm still not sure this story merits as much attention as it's getting with this five-issue mini-series.

X Lives of Wolverine #5 (March 16):  As expected, Wolverine manages to force Omega Red from his mind and, through their shared connection, locate him in Russia.  Logan kills Omega Red and returns the Cerebro Blade to Sage who then directs him to help the Wolverines fight off Omega Logan.  

Just like "X Deaths of Wolverine," I can't say that I minded this mini-series, but I'm still not sure what its point was.  Marvel's obvious attempt to turn them into the next "House of X"/"Powers of X" raised the bar way too high.  Those mini-series ended with the complete recreation of the X-titles, whereas the only outcome from "X Lives and Deaths of Wolverine" is maybe that Moira dies?  The stakes, they are low.

Also Read:  X Lives of Wolverine #4 (March 9); Amazing Spider-Man #92.BEY (March 16)

Four-Month-Old Comics: The Superhero January 5 and 12 (2022) Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Amazing Spider-Man #84 (January 5) and #85 (January 12):  This story is a two-parter, so I'm reviewing these issues together.  

Per pet peeve #2, Ziglar reveals that Dr. Octopus didn't just discover in issue #80.BEY that Beyond was using the Spider-Man name that he trademarked but also some inventions that he created.  Needless to say, he isn't happy.  

In issue #84, he breaks into one of Beyond's offices to steal a drive that Maxine later underscores is essential to Beyond's operations.  Spidey tries to stop him, but Otto somehow manages to use Beyond's own security system against him.  We're also treated to some "classic Doug" (as Ben quips) when he runs into the guy who gave him the anti-"weirdness" pill in issue #80.  Ben's interaction with Doug is an issue #84 highlight.

In issue #85, Otto storms into Beyond HQ to recover his inventions and take out Maxine so that he can take over Beyond.  I have to say that I don't totally buy this part; it feels too impulsive for Otto.  At any rate, Ben arrives in time to save Maxine from Otto.  Their fight spills onto a nearby rooftop where Otto gives Ben the drive to show him that Beyond chose him due to his unstable psychological profile.  Ben loses his shit over the revelation, as it undermines the sense of belonging that he finally found at Beyond.  Later, he smashes a mirror that showed a faceless reflection, which mirrors (heh) a nightmare about a faceless Uncle Ben that he's been discussing with Dr. Kafka.

In other words, we're going places, and all directions seem bad for Ben.  Ben lies to Maxine and Janine here, telling them that his fight with Otto destroyed the drive.  Before Dr. Octopus' roof-top revelation, Ben seemed off-kilter most of this issue, obsessively focused on the idea that he belonged and that Beyond let him do good.  Now that he's adrift, I worry where we're going.

Inferno #4 (January 5):  This issue begins with a bang.  

Surprising Magneto and Professor X, Nimrod and Omega Sentinel kill the Orchis soldiers who arrived with them in Terra Nova.  They explain to Magneto and Professor X that they hate humans as much as they hate mutants.  They crow that Magneto and Professor X's nightmare has arrived:  mutantkind has conquered humanity only for its real enemy - machines - to arrive.  

Confirming what I thought last issue, Destiny and Mystique left behind Moira's arm to draw Magneto and Professor X to Terra Nova and escaped to somewhere else.  Moire "reminds" Mystique that she can't die, and Mystique disagrees.  Mystique shoots Moira who...

...doesn't die.  It looked like she did, thanks to the excellent art team.  But, it turns out Mystique shot Moira with the weapon that Forge created to strip mutants of their powers.  (Hickman really is Chekhov, man.)  Setting up the moment, Hickman expands the scene from last issue between Destiny, Emma, and Mystique.  Emma tells the pair that Moria's tracker is in her arm (I was wondering how they knew to leave behind her arm) and gives them Forge's weapon.  

In the present, a now-human Moira admits to Destiny and Mystique that her hard-won knowledge led her to believe that the only way mutants win is by not existing:  her goal was to "cure" mutants before they manifested, a cure that we saw her create in her third life.  I have to admit, Hickman really sells this moment.  Moira clearly has PTSD from a millennium's experience with death and war, to the point where it's hard to fault her for taking the position that she does.  Despite Omega Sentinel's insistence that the mutants always win, Moira claims that they always lose, either to the humans or the machines.  

Before Mystique can kill her, though, Doug arrives, looking sexy as fuck.  He reminds Mystique that Moira is now human, so Mystique can't kill her under Krakoa's laws.  Mystique declares that she's going to kill him instead, though Bei, Krakoa, and Warlock make it clear that it won't be easy.  Destiny tells Moira that Doug is the axis around which they all didn't know they spun.  By deciding to save Moira, Doug creates three possible outcomes:  1) Mystique is exiled for killing him, and Destiny dies six months later and isn't resurrected; 2) they fail to kill him, and Mystique dies but is likely resurrected; or 3) they agree to let Moira go, and she and Mystique consolidate powers as does Doug.  They obviously choose the latter.  

Doug has Warlock provide Moira with an arm and Krakoa with a one-way gate that will close to her forever once she passes through it.  In a hilarious scene, she asks if he's going to wish her luck before she goes through the gate, and he simply replies, "Nope."  She asks Destiny and Mystique if they'll come after her, and Destiny tells her that it won't just be them.

After dying at Nimrod's hands, Magneto and Professor X are later resurrected.  Since Nimrod crushed Cerebro, they don't remember their conflict with him.  They also awaken to learn about the changes that happened while they were dead.  Professor X is condescending as usual when he asks Emma what she's done, and her answer puts him in his place.  She told the Council all their secrets, and they all agreed that the only thing that Magneto and Professor X did wrong was keeping their secrets to themselves.  As Emma says, the Council now becomes a curse, and Professor X gets to resume his status as primus inter pares because he's the guiltiest of them all.  Ha!  So true.

All in all, this series was excellent, and Hickman leaves us wanting more, which I assume that we'll see addressed in "Immortal X-Men."  To whit:

• I have to assume that Magneto and Professor X didn't know what Moira was planning.  When they learn, they're going to have to confront the fact that Destiny and Mystique were correct and they were wrong.

• I'm curious how and when Moira was planning to act on curing mutantkind.  Why was it necessary to allow Krakoa to come into fruition before she acted?

• As Destiny said, Moira's future is also unclear.  Does she join Orchis?  Does she focus on stopping the machines?

• It'll be interesting to see how the power dynamics evolve on the Council.  After all, Magneto and Professor X were working with someone bent on destroying mutantkind, and it was Destiny and Mystique who saved the day. 

• Of course, Cypher stopped them from killing Moira, opening up a new power center on Krakoa.  Doug's ascendancy is the most interesting story for me going forward.

I've talked a lot of smack about Jonathan Hickman over the years.  But, I am just beyond thrilled with what he's done with the X-Men.  Fair winds and following seas, Jonathan.

X-Men #6 (January 5):  Holy fucking shit, this issue is fucking intense.  

The issue starts "a week ago" with the appearance of a hero dubbed Captain Krakoa.  Six days ago, Scott is furious when the Quiet Council insists that he has to accept Captain Krakoa onto the X-Men's roster.  

Meanwhile, Feilong arrives on Phobos to colonize it, a move that, frankly, the X-Men probably should've seen coming.  But, I didn't see it coming and, honestly, I laughed out loud when it happened.  Brilliant.  When an Arakkii mutant arrives to take out Feilong, Sunfire tries to stop him, but Feilong doesn't need the help:  he uses his post-human powers to incinerate him.  

Duggan first hinted that something is amiss when we learn that Feilong found Nightcrawler's corpse on Phobos.  But, it all comes to a head when Captain Krakoa arrives at the Treehouse with a memorial to Cyclops underway.  We learn that Cyclops died recently in a public manner and that he's Captain Krakoa.  

When a furious Scott calls Ben Ulrich, likely to confirm his resurrection story, Ben has no memory of it.  The last panel is haunting, as a stunned Scott sits on a subway platform alone.  I have no idea where Duggan is going here, but this issue is so perfectly executed that I cannot fucking wait. 

Darkhawk #5 (January 12):  This ending is solid because it leaves a lot on the table.  Normally, I'd be annoyed by that, but Higgins does it in a way that shows how much potential Connor has a character.  

First, Connor comes with a lot of drama.  Derek's sister resents the fact that Connor defined her brother's life, a point that the paparazzi appearing at Derek's funeral to get photos of Connor underlines.  Plus, Shawn reveals that he knows that Connor is Darkhawk after Darkhawk's too quick appearance after Connor's departure last issue.  (That said, I'm glad Higgins went this route, because plenty of other authors would've pushed our willful suspension of disbelief by having Shawn remain clueless.)  I assumed that Higgins was going to kill off Shawn since he knows Connor's secret identity, but he doesn't, which really catapults Shawn into arch-nemesis territory.  Moreover, Connor outs himself to his teammates about his multiple sclerosis, and they encourage him to keep playing while he can.  It's all a lot for a teenager.

But, the Darkhawk drama isn't insignificant either.  It seems like Chris Powell is alive at the Tree of Shadows, though given how menacing he seems it could also be someone else, like Robbie Rider.  I'm also loving Connor's friendship with Miles Morales, and I hope that continues.

Again, we don't get resolutions here, but Higgins hopefully convinces Marvel that Connor has enough juice to give him a monthly title.

Hawekye:  Kate Bishop #3 (January 12):  I've read virtually every issue with Kate Bishop in it, and I still have no idea what Nijkamp is doing with her here.  The "ring" that her sister hired her to find is also somehow a Cosmic Cube fragment that her sister swiped from either her ex-husband or her father.  I think?  Also, it appears that the Circus of Crime is responsible and likely arranged everything to entrap Kate.  Maybe?  Honestly, I have no fucking idea.

Marauders #27 (January 12):  "Marauders" wraps up more or less how I expected, which isn't a bad thing.  

Emma and Shaw leave their posts to focus on the Quiet Council, which I assume is driven more by the upcoming "Immortal X-Men" series than any real desire on their parts to abdicate the roles that have defined their adult lives.  Lourdes will replace Shaw, and the Five in One will replace Emma.  

Again, I'm not sure that I buy Shaw leaving so easily, though Duggan makes a good go at explaining it as Shaw seeing an opportunity for Shinobi to take over the Hellfire Trading Company, which women now run.   (It's nice that Shaw still views Shinobi as his son, despite Leland being Shinobi's biological father.). You'd think after Emma, Kate, and Storm have all recently beaten his ass that he'd be more enlightened.  Ah, Shaw.

Duggan also throws in a surprise, as Kate seems willing to give Mr. Fantastic the knowledge that Charles wiped from his mind so that she can use the gates.  This step seems incredible dangerous on Kate's part, a level of selfishness that we don't usually see from her.  As such, I'm assuming that she has something else up her sleeve here.

My only real disappointment is that Iceman is leaving, though I'm hoping that it means that we'll see him somewhere else.  I did enjoy the idea that he's off flexing his muscles, something that clearly excites Christian.  Omega top time!

Also Read:  Dark Ages #4 (January 12)

Five-Month-Old Comics: The Superhero November 10, 17, and 24 (2021) Edition (HERE BE SPOILERS!)

Amazing Spider-Man #78 (November 10):  I'm happy to say that I loved everything about this issue.  I loved Felicia and MJ's conversation, I loved Colleen and Misty's banter, I loved Maxine's evilness and Ben's hotness:  I loved it all.

Amazing Spider-Man #78.BEY (November 17):  I loved this issue, too!  Avengers Murder Mansion!  How good is that!

The Beyond Board more or less answers my initial question of what Beyond gets from hiring superheroes:  namely, they get research.  For example, Martine initially refused to let Ben's doctor inject him with the Mobius anti-toxin last issue because she wanted to consider what sort of powers a vampire Spider-Man would have.  She notably wants to consider that not just to power up Ben but because they might be able to replicate the powers for sale.  

In this issue, she sends Colleen and Misty after an extraterrestrial Telletubby-like creature whom she calls Obsidian Star.  She's furious when they return from battle without its power source, and Colleen and Misty "remind" her that the point was to help people.  In reality, they give it to Monica Rambeau, who appeared last issue asking them for information about Beyond.

In other words, stuff is afoot.

Dark Ages #3 (November 17):  This issue continues a great run so far.  Laura identifies Apocalypse as Tony's kidnapper, and the team sends Pietro to see what Apocalypse is doing with him.  But, Pietro is distracted when he sees his father in chains.  Apocalypse also has Dr. Octopus working for him, and Otto's defenses take out Pietro in his moment of weakness.  

Under Killraven's control, Pietro returns to the team and murders Johnny Storm and Okoye before Jean can free his mind.  When he reveals that Reed is alive and working with the other subservient heroes, the team prepares to deploy.  Knowing they will, Apocalypse readies Carnage-nom (Ve-nage?) to attack.  

So far, Taylor is passing my main test for these "What If...?" series, namely whether the sequence of events feel logical to me.  I wonder what other terrible things Apocalypse has planned...

Moon Knight #5 (November 17):  Holy shit, this issue is fucking intense.  

First, you have Marc's therapy session, where Dr. Sterman pushes Marc to admit that he's so invested in Moon Knight because it's cost him everything:  if he isn't Moon Knight, he has nothing left.  (He suggests that he developed D.I.D. because he'd rather be anyone other than Marc Spector.  Oof.)  

But, the shit hits the fan when it turns out Terry is the one watching Marc.  Terry initially tells Marc that it's Soldier, whom we learn is an ex-HYDRA soldier.  Terry uses Soldier as bait, though, forcing Marc either to leave the rigged room without saving Terry - proving himself a fraud, in Terry's eyes - or to die in the ensuing explosion.  Marc being Marc, he has a plasma torch on hand and manages to save them both only to encounter Terry on the street, who puts on a mask and tells Marc to call him Zodiac.  

McKay makes it clear that Zodiac is a formidable challenge for Marc, a change from the last few issue where Marc has mostly waltzed through his challengers.  I'm excited to see what Marc can do if he lets loose.

Hawkeye:  Kate Bishop #1 (November 24):  This issue isn't terrible, but something about the delivery is odd.  Nijkamp does a decent job of getting down Kate's voice, but she certainly doesn't shine the way that she did under Fraction or Thompson.  Moreover, the plot is bizarre, with Kate's estranged sister engaging in some pretty ridiculous subterfuge to trick Kate into helping her.  I mean, I'll read pretty much anything with Kate Bishop, but it's hard not to wish that this mini-series didn't involve Thompson revisiting the West Coast Avengers (RIP).

Also Read:  Darkhawk #3 (November 3); Winter Guard #3 (November 3); Amazing Spider-Man #79 (November 24); X-Men #5 (November 24)